To Live Perchance to Dream

• Seeing the Parthenon
• Learning ancient Greek
• Learning fencing
• Participating in an archaeological dig
• Learning to play the piano
• Learning ASL
• Working at the Metropolitan Museum of Art
• Election to Phi Beta Kappa
• Acquiring my Ph.D.

I'm still reading The Last Lecture, by Randy Pausch, and have been struck by his discussion of childhood dreams. Those are some of mine above, and in one way or another, I've achieved all of them. Some are more complete than others--I'm not great at any of the things I've learned, but I have taken classes in each--I can still strike the basic fender's pose, can hold a conversation in ASL with a patient person, can chant part of the Iliad in Greek, and can pick out any song in C major. I was on a dig in Tunisia, at an old Roman bathhouse. I was elected to PBK in college. I was an intern at the Met. I have my Ph.D.

But there are other dreams that still need work. I want to take Italian. I want to be able to speak some Mandarin. I want to see the Forbidden City. I want to go back to Italy, with Mama and the kids. I'd love to go to Ireland or Scotland, after seeing London yet again. I want to become an expert bread baker and pie crust maker. I want to be a better gardener. And I want to work at the Met again. These are more recent dreams. Some just take money and time, others require actual skill and mastery. All are, I believe, attainable.

These last ones aren't my childhood dreams, but I think they are no less important, no less lofty, for not having been dreamt of when I was younger. I think the fact that I am still dreaming, still planning, is a good thing. If I stuck only to my childhood dreams, I wouldn't have children. Or be "married." Neither of those were on my original list, but they are what really make my life complete. I try to embrace new dreams and ideas as they occur to me.

Many days, though, my dreams are small. Not really dreams at all: an organized basement, a neater house, thinner thighs. Those are goals. Dreams are somewhat bigger, somewhat out of the realm of my ordinary life, somewhat less attainable, more enriching. But I get bogged down in these smaller goals and forget to dream big, or at least, bigger. What can I do each day, or week, or in the near future to achieve my dreams? For instance, what is the best way to get to work at the Met? Do I need to publish more articles now? Volunteer at a local museum? Work part-time as a collegiate lecturer to stay in education? Get my alternative route to teacher certification and teach history for awhile? What will get me what I want later, while still fitting into what I want now, which is to be a loving, present, active mom?

I daydream about my kids but don't have specific dreams for them. In other words, I'm not planning that they become doctors or astronauts. I want to give them the imagination and creativity to come up with their own dreams and the tools to achieve them. And along the way, maybe we can fulfill our dreams together, like we'll be taking Chinese together this fall. I wonder where they will take me . . . and my dreams. I know that one of my dreams took my mom to Greece to see the Parthenon and that she encouraged me to fulfill others alone, as when I went off by myself as a 19 year old to Tunisia (at that time, polticially suspect because of the connections with the PLO). I think that enabling and helping your children to fulfill their dreams is one of the greatest gifts you can give them, something that Randy Pausch mentions too. And not just with cash, either, but with skills that will lead them on to other achievements as well.

It's not just for your own children, actually, this gift of dreams. Mama and I help each other, with encouragment, support, inspiration, practical advice, time, money, and love. And we dream dreams together. The gift of dreams--to loved ones, friends, even strangers--is one of the greatest gifts of all.

I have a friend, Lambeth, who is I-forget-exactly-how-old-but-older-than-my-parents. He is one of the most active and well-travelled friends I have. And right now, he is walking the Thames. I don't know how long he has dreamed of doing that--I hope he talks about his inspiration on his blog someday--but he is doing it. And so many other things (a recent trip to the Balkans, tracking down obscure and long-lost relatives, wasn't there a mountain in Scotland you climbed recently, Lambeth?). He is a constant source of inspiration to me that dreams are achievable. As Dara Torres recently said, on winning in her 5th Olympics at age 41, "There are no age limits on dreams."

What are yours?