We had stopped by the pizza place to grab lunch after swim lessons and someone there recognized us from kindergarten orientation. Her daughter would be in Sis's class. Bud was immediately upset. "Why can't I be in Sis's class? I want to be together."
They all played together for awhile, as we waited for our pizza, but Bud came over more than once for a hug and a pat. "Why isn't anyone in my class? I don't want to be alone."
Reassurances of new friends and upcoming playdates went unheard. By the time we got home, it only took tripping over his own foot in the entryway to elicit this storm of sadness. Where he has been prone to being angry about things beyond his control recently, wanting "alone time" to cope with it, asking us not to talk about it, sometimes needing to stomp or yell or pull all the covers off his bed, today he crawled up into my lap, arms flung around my shoulders, and sobbed into my chest uncontrollably for what seemed like an eternity.
All I could do was rub his back and tell him I loved him. The tears had to cry themselves out. They did eventually, when cooling pizza tempted him to the kitchen, where he insisted on sitting so close to me that we could touch.
But the pain and fear of separation and isolation linger just below the surface, ready to flood us both.
Seems you have a problem but because it has turned up early you have time to talk to other mothers of twins and perhaps get a solution or two to try. It must happen a lot so clearly the children come to terms with these separations which are really only for a few hours at a time. The school too, will have met it, many times, not just with twins.
ReplyDeleteFear not, it will work out.