Thursday, June 13, 2013

The Growing Season

I went to the kiddos' school today for their Whole School Meeting (WSM) because Sis and her friends were singing Cookie Monster's version of "Call Me Maybe" a.k.a. "Share it Maybe" in front of everyone. They did a wonderful job, especially with enunciating the lyrics.  Quite a tickle!

At some point in the program of "shares," the principal had the second grade stand up so everyone could wish them luck as they head to their new school next year, here at their last WSM.

Last.

It was my last official visit to their school, unless I make an unscheduled visit with brownies or something (and brownies have been requested by more than one of the teachers and staff!)

I am so sad.  I love this school.  The teachers supported us as we all got acclimated to school and had questions about routines, curriculum, pedagogic theory, whatever.  They have been nothing if not completely supportive, if not even blase, about the whole lesbian-parents thing, even though we were the first (or so I'm told.)  They loved our kids and liked us.  You probably recall that the transition into daily, albeit half-day kindergarten just three years ago was rough.  I herniated a disk about a month beforehand.  Was it the stress?  Probably not entirely given my physical anomalies from birth.

Still, I see the stress even now.

As they are acting more and more like older kids everyday.  There is more sass.  More attitude.  Not quite eye-rolling, but almost.  More complaining.  Fewer hugs.  Fewer requests to play.  Less interest in bedtime stories.  Things have been a little tense.

It doesn't help that I'm peri-menopausal, officially.  I know people say it's worse to go through menopause when you have teenagers--and I imagine they are right, but this is no picnic either.  And depending on how long it lasts, they might be tweens when I'm done.

We knew eventually that they would be less devoted to us, more separated, even more embarrassed.  And all things considered, they developed sass later than many (I have friends who complained about it in kindergarten!).  Still, I can totally see that they are closer to 10 than they are to 5 and the difference is powerful.  (Even if they sang a Cookie Monster song.)  The fact that they are going to the "big school" (and it is bigger, more than twice as many kids and staff) only serves to underscore the changes.

And so it took all my efforts not to sob during the WSM today.

Because I do want them to grow up and grow independent.

And I really don't want to herniate another disk.

Because that was harder than kindergarten.

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