Tuesday, June 11, 2013

The End

My hospice patient died today.  Alone.  I know because I'm the one who found her, not breathing, but still somewhat warm.  I'm sad not because she died, which is a relief from her suffering, but because she died alone.  I'm glad I could be there for her in the days before her death, even if I wasn't there for the end.  Still sad, though.  I hope I am able to be there for my friends and loved ones when their times come, and they for me.

2 comments:

  1. I'm glad to you were there. I have asked myself the very same questions. i only hope my family will be with me at the end. The night my Grandmother died I had been with her for hours and we knew she was going to die soon. I stayed and stayed because I wanted to be there when she died but she kept holding on. I said to her before I left, it's OK Memere you can go now. I love you and will miss you terribly but's OK for you to let go now. I left and by the time I got home they called and she had died. I so wanted to be there with her but I think she wanted us to go and maybe she wanted to know it was Ok with us for her to die???

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  2. Hey-ho, that is the way life is. I was with both my parents when they died, I doubt that they knew it but at least they did not die alone. Similarly with Maggy. This is one of those few cases when I believe in fate. Be assured, your patient knew that people cared for her even if they were not there. You are a good person, have a cry, get some sleep.

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