Oh, Brother, Bear!

The kids have added a new movie to their repertoire along with Finding Nemo: Brother Bear, "the story of a boy who becomes a man by becoming a bear." Sure, most kids watch moralistic but lighthearted tales about cars or penguins or princesses; my kids watch a moralistic Native American tale about death, revenge, love, and redemption.

In short, there are three brothers: Sitka the oldest; Denahi the middle, and Kenai the youngest. On the day he is to get his spirit totem (which turns out to be the bear of love), Kenai doesn't tie up the fish they have all caught and a bear comes. When Kenai confronts the bear, tragedy ensues. Sitka dies when he intentionally knocks himself and the bear off the glacier to try to save his brothers from the bear. But the bear survives and Kenai goes after it in revenge, though Denahi counsels him not to (since he blames Keenai, not the bear). Kenai kills the bear in cold blood. And Sitka, who is now the embodiment of his totem of guidance, an eagle spirit, changes Kenai into a bear to teach him a lesson. Denahi thinks the bear, now Kenai, has killed Kenai and so sets off to kill the bear, picking up Kenai's quest. Confused yet? Anyway, Kenai meets up with a bear cub named Koda who has been separated from his mom and together the two trek to the place where the Northern Lights meet the earth, where Kenai can become a man again (not that he's told Koda that he's not really a bear). On the way, Kenai learns to appreciate bears, nature, love, family, etc, but has a particular revelation about these when he finds out that he had killed Koda's mom, the bear in the beginning who was only, we now learn, protecting her cub Koda. In the end, when Kenai meets Sitka on the mountain, followed by Denahi, he chooses to stay a bear and take care of Koda, who needs him (and who now knows that his "big brother" had killed his mom but stays with him anyway, a model of "brotherhood" and forgiveness in contrast to Kenai's earlier revenge of Sitka). Koda's mom even appears with Sitka and hugs Koda. And the new family of three brothers--Denahi, Kenai the bear, and Koda--go to the final ceremony where Kenai becomes a "man" and puts his paw print on the cave wall.

It makes me cry every time.

What were we thinking?

And as much as I can blame Mama for the pick (even after she checked parental reviews online! And mind you, we'd seen it years ago but had forgotten), I've actually been pretty amazed by the discussions the kids and I have had about the movie. Bud keeps going back to "why did Sitka die on the mountain" or "why did Kenai kill Koda's mom" and trying to understand. Sis is more concerned about the spirits, either the meaning of the totems or the actual spirits living in the Northern Lights. We've talked about death and afterlife, redemption (or "learning a lesson") and the golden rule and forgiveness, about what it means to be a family and what love is. And they have these amazing insights, like "Kenai decides to stay a bear so he can be Koda's new mommy." Or, "Koda's mom comes back because she is missing the fun and wants to say goodbye." We talked about all the "brothers" in the film, the original three, how Kenai becomes Koda's brother, and even the comic relief of the moose brothers. And I pointed out that even though there weren't any sisters (or many women at all), the movie is about all family. We also talked a little about why it makes me cry, since they've noticed both times (yes, we've watched it twice and they want to watch it again today. I figure we'll watch until we don't have any questions. But only once a day). And I talk about how I'm sad for Koda and for Kenai, for Sitka and Koda's mom, and that I even cry because in the end Kenai made the right choice. And followed his totem of love . . .

So, while I couldn't believe we were watching this movie the first time through (and the questions started at the very beginning), I'm so glad we did. Again and again . . .