I graduated from PT today. I feel better than I have in the 10 weeks since the flare-ups began, though not quite as strong as before that. But I'm getting there and it was a good time to transition to "wellness," which allows me to use the PT place as a gym, with the therapists there to answer questions or suggest other stretches and exercises.
In truth, my reactions to this last day of therapy was very mixed. I was excited to pick-up my wellness enrollment forms, but then cried in the car from relief. And fear. It's been a long road since I threw out my back last summer and started therapy for that and my diastasis (torn abdominal muscles) in the fall. The last 10 weeks--after 5 weeks of constant reinjury--have been the hardest. I've learned so much about myself and my body, some discouraging, some enlightening, most revelatory, like why the hems of my skirts are never straight, why I can't do certain yoga moves involving balance, why I've always limped. But also that I'm a good starter and a lazy finisher.
Which is why it's amazing that I'm finished with therapy. In fact, after the last "road to wellness," I didn't do anything to celebrate today, not sure it would actually happen (I'm going to get cupcakes to take to my first wellness visit on Monday). For awhile, it felt like I would be in it forever (I'm sure my friends thought so, with the way I'd mention it constantly). It was comfortable, which is probably exactly why it's good that I'm done. But I'm scared--what if I hurt again? Is this the best I will be? It's really coming face-to-face with a chronic problem, one that promises (possibly) arthritis in my hips, orthotics, and who knows what else. What I do know is that I need to keep strengthening my core and that will help all manner of things. I can't fix the dysplasia or diastasis but I can lessen their impact.
So, in the end, it's been a great six months. I've learned so much, gotten stronger, and made some great friends.
And I guess, I hope, with those three things, I am ready to move onto the next phase.
"Wellness" sounds good.
No comments:
Post a Comment