Crashing the Tea Party's Tax-Day Rally

We saw you, Tea Partyers. We saw your angry signs and your hate-filled rhetoric sputtered from the Washington Monument and all over town yesterday. How quickly your mean words directed at Obama about taxes become rantings and ravings about gay marriage, abortion, prayer-in-school and all the hot-button right-wing causes. One of you stood by us at the smoosh-the-penny machine and we worried that the kids would ask about your vitrolic buttons and cruel t-shirt picturing Obama with the word "DOPE." You scared us. You all did. We felt unsafe in our nation's capitol, unsafe in our nation, as we walked around in our multi-racial, two-mom family unit, drove around with our "All Families Have Value" and rainbow MOM bumper stickers.

But we took some consolation in the fact that your numbers couldn't even cover the hill at the Washington Monument by half, when the whole town was filled for Obama's inauguration. And even you, you "Taxed Enough Already"-"Live Free or Die" (several wearing various Texas memorabilia, sad to say) crowd, took advantage of all those wonderful tax-supported national museums and monuments, needed the police and municipal services for your rally. You're all bark, not much bite, even if there were FOX news vans everywhere. Even thought recent articles say you're smarter (and wealthier) than the rest of us think (and of the nation in general), I saw you yesterday. And you're not.

Though you are all white and older and obviously scared.

Name Change

"Mom," Bud began, "why is it a 'babysitter' if we're not babies? You should call them 'kiddo-sitters.'"

Playdate Snack

It's rough-going here at the Hungry household, with the kids both very excited about our upcoming vacation and very disappointed that Skype didn't work with Gommie this morning (which we didn't discover until after Bud had set up for a puppet show and Sis brought down her big bunny etc for show-and-tell. It was extremely disappointing). We're having a couple of friends over this afternoon and, with no help from the kids who are either watching tv or moping that they can't have their treats for the trip now, I made cereal treats with craisins and chocolate chips. This insures that neither child will eat them, the one eschewing chocolate chips, the other craisins. Fine, with 20 servings in a 9 x 13 pan (that's cut 4x5, which makes big pieces), they're only 2 WW points each! More for me . . . .

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Mommy Hungry's Chocolate-Craisin Cheerio Marshmallow Treats

8 cup(s) Cheerios

10 oz Mini Marshmallows
1/4 cup(s) butter
1/3 cup(s) chocolate chips
1/3 cup(s) Craisins Dried Cranberries

You know what to do!

Tax Hairy Lesbians: An Explanation

Tax, or the Real Marriage Penalty: Get this, all of you who complain about the marriage penalty, or even taxes in general: Mama and I discovered that our tax refund is 1/4 of what it would be if we were legally married. See, in doing our state taxes--in a state where we are legally married--we had to calculate our federal taxes as if we were legally married--though gay marriage is not recognized on the federal level. And then we compared it to what the tax fund really is in our "unmarried" state. And it looks like this: we would get four times as much money back if one of us were a man and we were married. That's thousands of dollars, folks, over the courses of our lifetimes, that we won't get back, that we essentially "overpay" in taxes. Maybe the Tea Party would like to take up our cause??

Hairy: I got another haircut, from the same woman who messed up my hair last time, and, when told I was unhappy with it, she said, "Oh, you didn't want layers?" My goodness, I haven't asked for layers in years, always "keep it one length." But no problems, she cut it all one length. And then finished it curly. The kids . . . and I . . . liked it much better!

Lesbians--"Can you say that? I knew that you could." The kids have a new vocabulary word. Yep, they know what lesbians are. Sure, they know they have two mommies, but didn't know that this made us lesbians. It came up while we were talking about our friend Miss M in Chicago and we said, "She had a girlfriend. She was a lesbian." With their new word alarms going off, they asked immediately and so we said that lesbians are women who want to marry other women (okay, it's a very simple definition, and not exactly true in that "marry" part, 'cos not everyone wants to get married. I mean, really, since there is a lesbian marriage penalty!). Immediately, Sis wanted to know what women who want to marry men are called. And Mama and I looked at each other. "Heterosexual" is a big word (and we really don't like to use "homosexual" with all the scientific, old DSM/psychiatric overtones). So we settled for "straight." Which confused them because well, hair (though not mine) and rulers are straight. Oh, well, English is an imperfect language. We told them they could marry (or not!) whomever they want--and we didn't even warn them about the taxes!!

Tax Hairy Lesbians

No, that's not a new Tea Party plan, it's my mnemonic device to remember three posts I want to write.

(It was almost "harried lesbians marry!")

But I think I'll leave you hanging until I get to it.

In the Paper

Here, very briefly:

• Google tips
• Safe surfing
• Chinese Jews
• New Delhi food by taxi
• Wilma Mankiller obit
• that lady with the red glasses
• Tagine
• Eating classics in NYC with kids
• taking pictures of food

Yesterday, Today, Tomorrow: Published

• "I don't want to miss anything" of the usual hairwashing drama: Bud and Sis HATE having their hairwashed. Hate it. Big time. So much so that Mama and I have been known to rope innocent grandparents into doing the dirty deed . . . or to skip it far too long. There is always such screaming and crying and protesting that I'm convinced someone is going to hear it through the open windows and report us. Well, the other night, Bud began to object vociferously, mid-wash, meaning there was shampoo all over his head and he was trying to climb out of the tub. Unable to talk to this irrational being, I dumped a huge cup of water on his head, hoping to get all the soap out of his short hair in one swoop. And what was Sis doing, who had similarly protested her own hairwashing? Begging to get into the bathroom, "I don't want to miss anything!"
• Spring cleaning the garage, or what our kids taught us about purging: On Saturday, between the new bed delivery (see below) and the aborted old couch removal (the kid forget he was supposed to come get it), Mama cleaned out the garage while the kids and I helped and played. The garage held several things the kids have outgrown in recent seasons, from their old baby swings to their little picnic table, plus several hand-me-down big wheels and various and sundry other things. And so, we started hauling things to the curb, where we posted a "FREE" sign. I thought the kids would be resistant at first, as Mama and I had been to offloading some of this detritus of childhood. But they weren't---"We don't fit. Let's give it away!"--and they helped haul things to the curb. And then watched all afternoon as people stopped to look at the offerings and took things away. The kiddos were so thrilled when someone took something, knowing it would be enjoyed by someone else. The garage became less cluttered. And we all learned a big lesson in spring cleaning.
• We have a new bed!! Yep, the new bed is here. And wonderful. And truly--and no, I'm not getting paid for this endorsement (especially because I'm obviously not naming brands)--I can feel an enormous difference in how my body feels when I wake up in the morning. Sure, my problems are musco-skeletal and not cured by a bed, but it sure does help.
• Make hay while the sun shines--campfire dinner outside, new scooters, the frog in the underworld game. We ate outside twice this weekend, hot dogs and fixin's both times, the first actually on our outdoor firepit (thanks again, Cousin S!). The kids loved eating hot dogs, banana boats, s'mores, plus baked beans and salad for Mama and me. As I mentioned above, we'd been outside working in the garage, but also playing with the kids' new scooters, or kickboards, which Mama found on her favorite website, woot.com. These are three-wheel things that steer by tipping the handlebar. And the kids love them (and the required knee and elbow pads and helmets!). They even waited all weekend to show them to the older kids down the block. Oops. I forgot to explain the frog in the underworld and the hay reference. They were playing in the yard with their water toys, unable to use water because it was just a bit chilly, using grass instead. They called the various collanders and spinning toys and such, the "haymaker," and would chop grass with it. And then they pretended to chop one of their rubber frog toys, making "froggy tidbits." (Collective "ewwhhh.") The frog died and went to heaven, which was on the deck. But then two dinosaurs rescued the frog from heaven. I remarked to Mama that Christian stories don't usually involve rescues from heaven; that seemed more like Greek myths of the underworld. Sis overhead me and asked what I was talking about. So, I explained various stories of Hades, namely Orpheus/Eurydice and Persephone/Demeter over dinner, as well as the journey of Odysseus though I can't recall his story to the underworld (or Hercules for that matter; it's been a long time). And so after dinner, while we were cleaning up, the kids played frog in the underworld. And then begged to hear all the stories again today. I'm going to have to find my Edith Hamilton!
• Death and dying in my RE class--what does death look like, Badger's Parting Gift, burning origami, talking about our friend Miss M in Chicago, and butterflies for Holocaust remembrance day (for 1.5 million children killed). Yeah, Sundays have been chipper around here with my class's unit on death and dying. For the first unit, we walked around outside and found natural objects that reminded us of death. Coincidentally, most of the items were actually seeds, which allowed us to talk about the life cycle and the future growing out of the past. Then this Sunday we read a touching book about the death of a character named Badger, who has been an integral part of his community, which remembers all of the great things he taught them after he "goes down the Long Tunnel." I liked the book's description of death as "falling out of his body." The kids then wrote on a piece of origami paper how they wanted to be remembered and then folded it into a shape of their choosing. We burned them (or not) outside. Meanwhile, our kiddos made butterflies as part of Holocaust Remembrance Day--the Holocaust Museum in Houston is collecting 1.5 million of them, one for each of the children who died. Now, we didn't quite explain that to the kiddos, just saying it was about remembering the past. They cut out some great butterflies. We have, however, been talking about our friend from Chicago, Miss M, who died two years back. They ask about her, specifically about her death (though we've never explained breast cancer to them), and so this time we talked about what we liked about her, what she liked, how she was. Because, really, her death is just one event in a long, long life, with much better things to remember about her. Just like Badger.
• Charlie and the Chocolate Factory movie: The new one, with Johnny Depp, which was psychologically more revealing of Willy Wonka's past. It was kinda the grown-up version of the story, darker, more 21st century. Though, really, who doesn't like Gene Wilder singing about spring? Mama even liked it too (because who can resist Helena Bonham Carter, even as a poor housewife?).
• Go Van Gogh!, or my day teaching art at preschool--this probably deserves its own post and so I'll just say that I spent Friday discussing Starry Night with four-year olds, without mentioning Van Gogh's depression, ear-mangling, or suicide. Which makes him just another dead white guy who painted.
• Advanced thinking--three bucket trick, pregnant turtles, and airplane itineraries. Sis is our analytical thinker. Charged with removing some toys from the deck, she stacked the three buckets inside one another so she only had to make one trip. Then, while watching "Franklin and the Green Knight," Sis observed that Franklin's mom (they're all turtles) was pregnant despite the fact that turtles lay eggs. "It must be because she can stand up and walk." Lastly, observing several planes fly overhead during our outdoor dinners, she said that all the people in several planes must be going to the same place because they are headed in the same direction. Smartest brain, indeed.
• Artsy side--dinosaur marionettes and dragon kites--and just as Bud noted, he is our creative thinker. He's been obsessed with making 3-D dinosaur marionettes out of paper with strings. He has even made a posterboard backdrop with a volcano in front of which he can make his pterodactyl fly and stegosaurus dance and bow. Also, he's been drawing pictures of dragons, this time not as dancers, but as kites on strings. One of these days I will write a long post about his newfound love of drawing, encouraged by our own artist Mama. He really learns and explores through drawing, making him a visual/kinesthetic learner, I suppose. When he was interested in knights, he drew jousters and castles; for China, it was the Great Wall, temples, and dragon and lion dancers; for space, it was a moonscape with planets, rockets, and satellites; there have also been Vikings, Native Americans, trains, cars on racetracks, dragons, works of art, what we've done during the day, etc etc etc. I'm really going to have to scan and post some of these.
• thinking of Wilma Mankiller and Dixie Carter. Two strong women. Rest in Peace.

Bon Voyage!

Happy spring break to both my friends traveling out of town and out of state, as well as to those enjoying the respite (is that what it is when the kids stay home from school?) at home.

Revisiting the Scene

No, not of a crime, but of last year's head-gash-needing-staple episode at our local park. We had a playgroup there this morning, it being spring break and beautiful and all. Sis and Bud were extremely excited about our park-cum-picnic outing and headed to the playset immediately. But they were both very apprehensive about being on the staggered steps where Bud's accident occurred. He went across, though, timidly at first with my holding onto him. Sis cautiously followed. I was so proud of them. Soon, after about 5 crossings, they weren't thinking about it at all. And they were climbing all the other bits of the playset that they'd been to little to traverse before. More kids showed up--both our little friends and older, bigger (read: more dangerous) kids--and my kids grew more and more confident and comfortable. And crazy. Bud was tearing around the playset with reckless abandon . . . and with Sis tearing after him. And now all the apprehension and timidity and caution were on my part, as I worried about the number and size and rambunctiousness of the other kids, plus the confidence, perhaps even bravado, of my own. The more time passed, the more they were having fun, the more worried I became. I stood nearby, enough, but know from experience that you can practically be holding them and accidents can still happen. But I tend more towards helicopter parenting (the whole demise of the independent culture of childhood be damned!) and there were some kids that were a). obnoxious (intentionally blocking stairs even when asked to move) b). aggressive (like the kid who kept biting other kids!) and c). unaware of their own movements, so I hovered some. Yes, it's true, I'm not very comfortable at public parks with strange kids around and only go if accompanied by friends. Especially at this park. But, geez, there wouldn't be two emergency-room trips for us from the same playground, right? My friends just smiled (none too comfortingly, I might add, Mommy Goose! :) ). But it was all okay. In fact it was great. But let's see if we can wait another year until we go back . . . . instead of this afternoon, as they are requesting!

(The picnic part was fun, too, and at least temporarily got the kids off the playset! We enjoyed Mommy Goose's blueberry muffins, Miss N's carrot-raisin cookies, and my rainbow fruit salad, made with strawberries, cantaloupe, pineapple, kiwi, and blueberries arranged in an arch!)

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Carrot Oatmeal Cookies (from Sprouts' Cookbook)
1/2 cup sugar
1/2 cup canola oil
2 cups shredded carrots (about 2.5 M-L carrots)
2 large eggs
2 cups white whole-wheat flour
1 cup rolled oats
1 tsp cinnamon
1 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp salt
1 tsp vanilla
optional: raisins, dried cranberries, pecans or other nuts

Preheat oven to 375 F, spray two baking sheets
Grate carrots
Beat oil and sugar with a fork
Beat to eggs and add to oil
Add carrots and vanilla.
If using, add dried fruit and nuts
Combine flour, oats, cinnamon, baking powder, salt and stir
Create well in dry ingredients and slowly add oil mixture and stir.
Using large dinner spoon drop batter on sheets 2" apart.
Bake 15-18 minutes or until golden brown.

Yields 2 1/2 dozen cookies.

Ancient and Heirloom Recipes

I have become a big fan of Whole Foods's steam table/salad bar/service counter area, having taken the kids there for lunch now and few times. Bud likes the fruit. Sis today got Virginia ham and a baguette. Mama got sushi. I wandered, looking at the wild rice salad (with chickpeas and squash), lemon quinoa (with squash and feta), marinated gigante-like beans, and all the wonderful Indian hot foods. Two of my new favorite salads are the Ancient Grains medley and Heirloom Beans salad. And today I found them in the prepackaged food-to-go section and so now have a better idea what goes into them. I'm definitely go to try making my own, probably pared down adaptations.

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Ancient Grains Medley

wheatberries

kamut

black barley

pearl barley

bell pepper

waterchestnuts

carrots

carrot juice

tofu

onion

sesame seeds

mirin

rice wine vinegar

tamari

agave nectar

ginger

dijon mustard

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Heirloom Bean Salad

Stuben yellow eye beans

cranberry beans

ivory white lentils

roasted peppers

artichokes

apple cider vinegar

agave nectar

red onion

parsley

capers

cilantro

seas salt

garlic

Yesterday, Today, Tomorrow: Unpublished

So many posts, so little posted:

• "I don't want to miss anything" of the usual hairwashing drama
• Spring cleaning the garage, or what our kids taught us about purging
• We have a new bed!!
• Make hay while the sun shines--campfire dinner outside, new scooters, the frog in the underworld game
• Death and dying in my RE class--what does death look like, Badger's Parting Gift, burning origami, talking about our friend Miss M in Chicago, and butterflies for Holocaust remembrance day (for 1.5 million children killed)
• Charlie and the Chocolate Factory movie
• Go Van Gogh!, or my day teaching art at preschool
• Advanced thinking--three bucket trick, pregnant turtles, and airplane itineraries
• Artsy side--dinosaur marionettes and dragon kites
• thinking of Wilma Mankiller and Dixie Carter

"I Have the Smartest Brain in the Family"

She had remembered, correctly, that the man from church who worked at the restaurant where we were eating today--though we didn't even actually see him because he works the dinner shift--had once written "pineapple cake" upside-down on a notecard to accompany his wife's dish at a potluck a year ago.

And I said she had a great memory.

Hence the title here, which was her reply.

Bud declared that he had smart brains too, because he came up with all the art ideas (his current craze is making marionettes--today he made 5 paper dinosaur marionettes, complete with strings, and put on a show).

And I was told that I knew everything.

Gosh, I love these kids.

Feeling "Yucky"

Nope, not what you think.

Not what I usually think either.

That's Sis and her glorious pronunciation of "lucky."

She tries to clarify for us--like when she found a "yucky egg"--now really, that could easily be either one!--and she kept repeating "yucky, Mom, yucky"--because it truly sounds different from the real yucky to her. Who knew there were lucky eggs in the house??

Of all the l=y words that the kids pronounce everyday, this one still evades detection by Mama and me and then suppressed merriment when we figure it out.

I'm really sorry they'll be outgrowing this one soon.

Being Counted

So, we filled out our census. But it was bittersweet in three main ways. First, Mama was listed first and so I had to then fill in my relationship to her via bubble choices. Well, legally, I'm her wife in Connecticut but, on a federal level, i.e. census level, we have absolutely no legal relationship. Ouch. But I checked wife anyway. Fuck 'em. Secondly, for the two slots for the kids, we also had to check their relationship to Mama, which legally is "adopted." Something we rarely think about. And always causes Mama to pause. Why can't it just say "child"--does the census really care if the relationship is biological or not? Fuck 'em. Finally, while we were proud to be able to fill in multiple race bubbles for the kids--Chinese and white (hmmmm, those aren't exactly parallel, are they?!)--we were sorry that President Obama again rejected a biracial identity and chose only African-American. Though, there are compelling historical reasons for that, I know, so I won't continue my twice-repeated refrain about him . . . .

Eat-Out Wednesday

"Eat-out day" is one of our new family rituals, designed to limit the number of times we think about going out to eat each week as well as to split the week in half with a bit of a celebration (today's eat-out meal is actually dinner, with Mama, before a program at school).

So, it's apropos that today I read the Motherlode post on "kid-friendly foods" and also received a list of lunch ideas I'd requested from my playgroup. First, on the post and its interview with cookbook author Joy Bauer on her new Slim and Scrumptious. (Okay, I HATE the title. If we're not supposed to be stressing physical beauty with kids or even ourselves--see an article on wabi sabi, the Japanese concept of beauty in imperfection which is known in art-historical circles because of the pottery for the tea ceremony, and physical beauty sent to me by Mommy Goose--why is the word "slim" in the title??? A total turn-off and, if Lisa Belkin hadn't posted about it, I never would have given the cookbook a second glance). But I liked Bauer's ideas (even if her forgiving 2-3 nights of processed foods seems like a lot) and her embrace of kid-friendly fare, which to me is often synonymous with comfort food. Her point about children not having an adult palate is well-taken--and I, childhood hater of mushrooms, onions, peppers, squash, carrots, yogurt, coffee, am a perfect example of someone whose taste has changed and diversified. Her quickie meal suggestions (sandwiches, baked potatoes, breakfast) and obvious but overlooked and I like her rule of thumb for snacks being under 150 calories. I do need to reconsider that "one bite" rule, which I am still loathe to enforce. But I see that it's the only way to get anywhere--not making anything new is not the answer (see, I have one picky eater and I feel like if I make a food I know she won't like, even if the rest of us do, that I am somehow favoring her brother; yes, I'm ultra-sensitive to sibling rivalry.) And I, lover of lists, liked her suggestions for snacks and fun dinners. So, put the cookbook on my check-it-out list!

Until then, I have a few other lists, this time for lunch ideas, from playgroup friends. I share it here in case you're in the same boat I am, running out of ideas for lunch that don't involve a check at the end of the meal! I've never really liked lunch options--ask my mom, who would send odd things like deviled ham, cheese, and crackers because I wouldn't eat sandwiches or any kind of cold leftover or salad. Even as a working adult, I would go looking for a hot lunch--is this a holdover from loving the school cafeteria food? I usually want something cooked, i.e. still no sandwiches and rarely a salad, but reheated leftovers or my ubiquitous soups. And the kids are starting to be as picky. This means, though, that sometimes I'm cooking breakfast (oatmeal, which I do on the stove) AND lunch AND dinner, which is even, to my eco-feminist mind, a bit much. And so the list (which, as I see, means that most of my friends cook lunch too!):

• egg and cheese sandwiches sometimes
• pasta, cheese, and peas
• mini-pizzas on pita bread
• hime veggies w/hummus, fruits
• dinner leftovers such as tofu, turkey meatballs (from Trader Joe's), chicken nuggets, baked beans with cous cous or quinoa, etc.
• I have a great recipe for chick peas with carrots, quinoa and raisins. My son likes it because it has a sweet flavor from the raisins and some orange juice.
• I also make quesadillas with refried beans, zucchini or peppers (diced) in the beans, and shredded cheese
• sandwiches--turkey, grilled cheese, egg salad, tuna salad
• make your own pizzas
• soups--chicken, noodle, tomato, split peas, lentil, wonton
• cottage cheese with fruits
• bagel and cream cheese
• yogurt
• hamburgers
• hot dogs
• chicken nuggets
• pasta, mac and cheese
• breakfast for lunch--omelet, pancakes, waffles, hashbrowns, etc
• stir fry with rice
• noodle bowls (noodles w/grilled meat/tofu)
• udon noodles (stir fry w/chicken and veg)
• any leftovers!

Too Hot

Okay, you Texan readers of my blog will chuckle outloud but it's HOT up here at 80F (on my car thermometer) in April. The kids, determined to have a picnic and play outside, wilted quickly and are now exhausted on the bed for rest time. The one upshot, for today, anyway, is that I can wear a skirt for the first time since September! But, thankfully, the temperature will drop to normal April levels around 50-60F very soon.

For Martina

Tennis great Martina Navratilova has been diagnosed with breast cancer and expects a positive recovery.

I really should have figured out about myself much earlier than I did, if only because I adored Martina! And still wish I'd seen her play in person . . . but my high-school lesbian buddy S did. Of course.

See Buddha Tonight

No, not a personal nirvana.

But a PBS special tonight, April 7, at 8 p.m.

Should be . . . enlightening.

In the Papers

• On West Virginia, of mines and basketball
• "Miracles in a minor key"--post-cancer observations by Dana Jennings
• Is a growth in family time good or evidence of "bad" helicopter parenting?
• Snopes, about the founders of the internet myth-debunking site
• Another touching post by Jane Brody on the loss of her husband
• Life with no facial expressions
• On the "last wife" of Norman Mailer
• Broccoli--can't wait for the summer!
• Friends and parenting styles--
• Bullies and more on bullies, specifically on being their parents
• Unexpected data on divorce and the loss of a pregnancy
• American optimism
• Dowd on the Pope--there have been a few great op-eds by Dowd on this. Really, it's too good to pass up, as the Vatican compares Benedict's recent persecution alternately to that of the Jews and to that of Jesus.
• And finally, a thank you to Mark Bittman, whose wonderfully-titled "Bitten" blog is being subsumed by Diner's Journal. I'll enjoy reading his updates wherever.

You've Got to Be Carefully Taught

To throw things away, that is.

My friend church Miss L mentioned it yesterday, that her daughter had chosen to give us a set of books and soon they would be purging both clothes and outdoor toys. Without a struggle? How?

"Because my husband is a hoarder," my friend answered, "I knew I had to teach the girls to throw things away."

Eureka.

I haven't taught the kids to give or throw things away at all. They're collecting used books for school and I asked our kids to look at our shelves of hundreds of books to choose a few to give away to kid without books and they couldn't find a one they wanted to part with. That's not good. And of course, there is the infamous kitchen playset giveaway from this Christmas. Our giveaway track record is abyssmal. When necessary, I ferret things out in the middle of the night or the equivalent. No wonder they don't like to put anything away, saying "I want to be able to see it!"--so Mommy can't get rid of it?! They're on to me. And it's not working!

I don't like doing it but hadn't seen another way. Looking back, I think it must be what my mom did--with the birthday party napkins I'd bring home, pamphlets and postcards I'd keep, all manner of stuff--only getting caught once when she threw away my old blankie. But I know I had lots of things that disappeared, never fully realizing where it all went until now. It's one way to do it and maybe the only lasting effect is my own minor hoarding habits (particularly of magazine articles and recipes).

As for Mama's habits, she doesn't throw much away at all and neither does her family. And there are benefits to this--the kids love playing with all the toys they've saved from Mama's childhood. And they always have what you might need or remember at that moment.

We don't have the space to save like that, with a lifetime of saved stuff already in our basement (slowly disappearing, I should add) and really do want to find a middle road for the kids. But having been raised by either secret tossers or hoarders, Mama and I don't have the skills for teaching the kids a life balance between saving and letting go. Though, we've gotten better, arranging to give away a beloved couch we've had for years, purging clothes I'd been saving for an eventual return to work that are just gathering dust and no longer "me," even considering selling Mama's beloved Civic in favor of something with 4-wheel drive. The will is there, sometimes, but the execution is a challenge.

And so, I realized yesterday that we all need to learn, to practice, that it's a skill like any other. Or a muscle that needs exercise to get stronger. I'm going to have to pick my friend's brain on how she gets the kids to get rid of stuff. She gave me a hint: bribe with promises of what you'll buy to replace what goes away since you'll be making space. Hmmm, that doesn't quite take the focus off of the material stuff but it might be a start.

So, spring cleaning, which is, obviously, never our favorite thing to do, will take on an added dimension this year, as we purge not only grime and dust but also some of the year's artwork and toys and magazine articles and clothes and knickknacks and gadgets and general odds-and-ends.