BTS! BTS! BTS!

I'm listening to BTS right now, and, if you don't know who they are, this post will be hard to understand!  (Visit here and here for more info, videos, and pics from the concert.)  Beware, Lambeth, I think they are headed to England next!

They are a seven-member, K-Pop boy band from South Korean, which means they perform in a mix of rap and song, Korean and English, with very complicated dance routines and coordinated outfits.  They have been together for 7+ years and are popular the world over but are only now making a relatively big splash in the US.  They have their own lingo--fans are called ARMY, their are specific chants for each song, fans have preferences of favored members which are called "bias" or "stans" (I'm sure I don't have that quite right.) Still, most people I know don't know them, despite topping several Billboard charts, winning at the Video Music Awards, selling out stadium concert venues, and appearing on "Good Morning America" and "Tonight Show" this week.

Bud loves their music and their dance routines, knowing all the lyrics (which he sings in Korean and English, having read the phonetics and the translations!) and the moves.  When we heard they were coming to the Prudential Center in NJ, Mama managed to get tickets in the upper balcony.  (For reference, they sold out the 42,000+ Citi Field in 10 minutes, with some seats going for $5K or more.  And that's not the scalpers' price.)  And so, on Saturday, the three of us (Sis stayed home to do horse things) trekked down to Newark, of which we'd only visited the airport before, early.  See, BTS fans are rabid--they known for screaming and dancing and buying up merchandise.  Even though we got to the venue about 6 hours early, we couldn't buy t-shirts or hats or hoodies or bandanas; they were all sold out.  (Oddly, they sell the concert merch outside the venue not inside and don't restrict it to ticket holders; they could've sold so much more stuff if they'd had it.)  Bud was bummed, so I snagged him a bootleg shirt from a guy with a full backpack.  He got the official light bomb, which officials programmed to his seat location so it can blink and flash based on the show, with colors and patterns determined by the house.  He also managed to get the last poster of the band!  Our cashier rushed to the table and grabbed it before the other cashier making a beeline for it could take it away; when they posted "sold out" on the sign, there were a hundred audible groans behind us!  Craziness.

We spent the rest of the afternoon milling with the other ARMY.  Mainly, Bud danced.  See, each song has a specific choreography which people learn.  So, some of the fan club people had brought a speaker and music and were playing the songs or just the choruses.  If you knew the song, you rushed into the open space with others and danced while everyone sang.  It was a beautiful flash mob!  And Bud danced his heart out.  He's got great moves, especially being one of the youngest there.

See, I thought there would be more young teens, but it was a lot of women in their early to mid-20s instead, some from as far away as Germany and Australia!  And of all races, not just Korean.  I saw Orthodox Jewish women, Muslim women in hijab, African Americans, Latinas, SE Asians (eg India, Pakistan), Caucasians, etc etc etc.  There was even a palpable lesbian presence (though not a discernible gay male one, which surprised me, given the relative androgyny, even femininity, by US standards, of the group.) BTS has a very wide appeal--they aren't vulgar or overly sexualized or violent or aggressive; their music speaks of emotions(albeit some hard ones)--the arc of three albums is entitled "Love Yourself," a major theme of their recent speech to the United Nations--and they are beautiful, talented young men (all between about 21-25.)

The talent was definitely on show on Saturday night.  They danced and sang for three solid hours (with no opening act, beyond their own videos, which the audience used for karaoke), taking turns with solos, in an elaborately produced show.  As far as I know, they sing live, not recorded, and they have vocal chops, which is not always noticeable on the heavily-produced recordings.  And they can all move!  Then, at the very end, they took 10 minutes to thank fans and express their gratitude, excitement, etc. Yep, I was very impressed.  And had a great time.  I don't know the lyrics or the fan chants, much less the dance moves, but it doesn't really matter.  I loved watching Bud have such a great time.  I think he screamed and sang the whole time, but it was so loud that, even though I was next to him, I couldn't hear him!  I'm glad he has some worthy Asian, male, celebrity role models, which Mama definitely didn't have growing up.  They have talent and work hard, talk about feelings and challenges, and work with UNICEF.  It makes a difference to see people who look like you succeed and be popular.  (Even as a white girl, I knew this at a very early age--I preferred Snow White and later Princess Leia because they were the rare heroines with dark hair! )

And they're just fun.  I'd go to their concerts again.  Yep, I'm a proud ARMY mom!

-=-=-=-=-=-

Setlist:

"Idol"

"Save Me"

"I'm Fine"

"Magic Shop"

"Trivia: Just Dance"

"Euphoria"

"I Need U"

"Run"

"Serendipity"

"Trivia: Love"

"DNA"

Medley: "Boyz With Fun / "Attack on Bangtan" / "Fire" / "Bapsae" / "Dope"

"Airplane Pt. 2"

"Singularity"

"Fake Love"

"Trivia: Seesaw"

"Epiphany"

"The Truth Untold"

"Outro: Tear"

"Mic Drop"

Encore:

"So What"

"Anpanman"

"Answer: Love"

Kidbits and Updates

Each is not a whole post, but together it's a lot of catching up:

• Last week, Sis and I went to a compass class with some of our GS friends.  And it was taught by a friend we had made at Hog Island last year!  So great to see her again.  I learned so much. I did not know how to read a compass.  Hold the compass flat in your hand, with the curved part at your wrist and the printed red "travel arrow" pointing out from your palm.  "Turn on the compass"--I know, it's not electronic--means to put the "red in the shed," i.e. move the "compass housing" so that the red part of the needle that always faces magnetic north moves into the outlined arrow or orienting lines/arrow.  Now you can tell what direction you are pointing by whatever direction and degree lines up with the travel arrow.  You reverse it to go in a particular direction.  Want to go Northwest?  Move the compass housing to put NW at the end of the travel arrow, move yourself to put the "red in the shed", and walk in the direction of the arrow.  At least I think that's right.  Sis was much better than I was.  I know there is so much more to orienteering but it was a great start.  I'll practice at Hog Island again this summer.
• We went to three orchestra concerts last week, one for our school and two where the kids from our orchestra were invited to play at other concerts to help round out the sound.  They played "Vida La Viva," a bit from "Eine Kleine Nachtmusik," "Shadows," and . . . something else.  I love hearing my kids play . . . and it was even bittersweet to hear the little ones play "Hot Cross Buns."  Sis and Bud have come a long way.  And they'll both be playing in the orchestra again next year.
• Piano duet.  Yep, Bud and I are finally playing a piano duet.  I had stopped taking piano during CPE but am starting up again for the summer.  And so we actually did some planning during Monday's lesson.  I'm dusting off "Finlandia" and "The Entertainer" (both easy piano) and then learning my part of "Vida La Viva."  Yes, the Coldplay song.  Just like Bud played in orchestra.  I know it.  He likes it.  And one of the parts is just my speed.  Only challenge is that I don't really count when I play, just play by ear to the tune I know, which makes it almost impossible to play in the right spot with a duet partner so I'm practicing counting.  Whew.  But the playing has rejuvenated Bud, who spent last night playing "Phantom of the Opera," "Prince Sidon," and other songs.  One of my favorite sounds in the world.
• Bud has had a few kung fu performance in the last few weeks, which is not our usual performance time (May and October are the big competition times; January/February are the big Lunar New Year performance times.)  He performed at Quassy Amusement Park, a small, old local park with rides and games next to a lake.  The performance went well, but the team had even more fun wandering around together and going on all the rides--swings, tilt-a-whirl, this big boat that swings like a pendulum, tea cups, another ride that flips and holds you upside down.  I enjoyed the lovely weather and riding the carousel.  Oh how I love a carousel!  Bud even rode with me towards the end of the day. 
• And he earned his Black Belt right before we left for Italy.  The school hadn't been doing belts for the team (it's more of a karate thing than a kung fu thing anyway) and so their Master gave the team the chance to earn their belts.  Bud practiced for weeks, on top of his years of kung fu, and he earned the black belt, embroidered with his school, and a beautiful plaque to go with it.  We're so proud of him!
• INDIGO GIRLS!  Last week, we all went to hear the Girls in concert in New London.  We arrived early enough for dinner (mac and cheese pizza, chix and broccoli and bacon pizza, pasta pomodoro, great salad and yummy cakes) at this great local pizza place, Two Wives--and the only men in the building were Bud and those on the staff!  Everyone was there for the concert, which always draws about 95% women.  Most of them were our age or older--and not even all of them were dykes!  Of the five others I knew there that night, only 2 were lesbians.  But they were moms of twins, just like us.  Gotta introduce the kiddos to the culture, you know?  It was great--they played most of our favorites.  We got home really late, but we didn't care.  Besides, it was Mother's Day weekend and there's not much these two moms like more than a Girls concert.
  
• Mama and I gave ourselves our big Mother's Day present:  we went to the Met museum all by ourselves, leaving the kids at home on Saturday.  I had wanted to see the Thomas Cole exhibition and it was closing on Sunday, but the kids didn't want to go.  And after three orchestra concerts, the Indigo Girls, the compass class, and a kung fu show, we decided they would probably enjoy a day at home much more . . . and we might enjoy the moms' night out all by ourselves.  And we did!  There was some traffic heading into the city on Saturday afternoon, but we talked all the way there.  The Cole show had some great pieces--Course of Empire, Oxbow River, a little trompe l'oeil with an oil sketch of a landscape, a view of Florence in front of which I no longer needed to say "I'd love to take you to Italy!"  There were also paintings by Claude Lorraine, de Loutherbourg, Turner, Constable, including cloud studies and Hadleigh Castle.  The concept of the show--Cole was influenced by European art and travels--was nothing new, but it was pretty.  We also liked the parallel show about Americans in Italy--with sketches and drawings and watercolors by Sargent, Elihu Vedder, and Maurice Prendergast.  We especially liked the Venetian views.  We enjoyed a ham sandwich on a baguette, rich chocolate cupcake, and a cup of coffee in the American courtyard, treating this trip into the city like we did Italy by taking it easy and enjoying ourselves, slowly.  The last show on our list was the French gardens show, tracing the rise of public gardens and private gardening as a hobby after the Revolution and through the 19th century.  There were still lifes by Fantin-Latour, Odilon Redon, Mary Cassatt--I loved her lilacs--and Caillebotte's chrysanthemums.  There were also many women-in-the-garden scenes by Manet, Monet, Renoir, Cassatt, and Morisot, though little discussion of the trope.  There were watering cans, hand rakes and trowels, and maps of gardens, including a great panorama postcard of the Tuileries with all these wonderful snippets of people.  It was a lovely show.  I think I might be getting excited about going back to Paris someday, with the kids, once they've had more French.  As we perused the shop--I got the gardens catalogue but not the Cole (I have the one from the very-similar Wadsworth show I saw when I came back to NYC in fall 1994 to see Glenn Close in Sunset Boulevard--when I stayed with Mama in her dorm, actually.  Full circle.)--I saw mention of a Visitors to Versailles show and so Mama and I trekked up to it.  Great 18th-century court costumes, dec arts, and even a room devoted to an early 18th-century visit by Siamese ambassadors from the court of Ayyuthaya who brought gifts and wore special hats. Yep, Thailand.  Circle again.  We absolutely skipped the Heavenly Creatures and the Catholic Imagination show; well, sort of.  It was spread out through the Medieval court on the first floor so we passed by the overdone fashions and big crowds on our way to other exhibitions.  It was a dramatic place to stage the show, with all the Catholic art of the Middle Ages, but I am completely uninterested in modern fashion. Give me those 18th-century court gowns any day.
• We saw Avengers: Infinity War.  Loved it.  It's past the point where I worry about spoilers; by now the details are well known.  Of course, it's the deaths that got everyone.  And we all seem to have the idea that most won't stick.  But I'm guessing they'll surprise us--it's too easy if Scarlet Witch somehow breaks the Soul Stone from the inside or Cap sacrifices himself for Bucky (and them all) and switches places with everyone in the Soul Stone.  I don't think he'll survive the next one, Cap.  And I think Black Panther, sweet Spidey, and all of those who disintegrated will be back. Doctor Strange knows exactly how it will all pan out.  No resurrection for mischievous Loki, though.  He was one of my favorites.  And I think Gamorrah will get, who I think entered the Stone as Thanos's sacrifice, will get out, too.  And all of that in time for the new Guardians, Spiderman, and Black Panther movies!
• Sis got her braces off!  She was so excited that she took a bag of popcorn with her to the appointment and had been planning her candy consumption for months.  Mama brought her a bag of jelly beans, gummy bears, Star Bursts, Carmellos, jar of caramel sauce, two bags of popcorn from Trader Joe's, and I don't know what else.  She now has a clear retainer.  And says her mouth is "soft!"  Bud will get his braces in a month (he lost his lost baby teeth later than she did)--I teased the orthodontist that he could just recycle the brackets and give us a discount. 
• CPE is wrapping up.  I have 62 hours left, a final evaluation paper (already at 10 pages), and three more essays.  Whew.  I witnessed a funny moment last week.  The priest startled a sleeping patient who then tried to get out of bed.  I fetched a nurse.  The patient kept saying, "I need to get to my business." (You could tell he meant work.)  The nurse said, "You can do your business here in bed."  "It isn't funny business!" he replied.  We all started to giggle.  The nurse said, "I can't believe you said that in front of the priest!"  The priest was laughing harder than all of us.  More on CPE later.  It's my day off!  Which means some Zentangle, crocheting, blogging, and watching reruns of "Arrow."

Music All Around

Between my vocal practices, the kids trying out for the school musical, and piano lessons, there is a lot of music in the house these days.

Every morning, I do my vocal exercises from the Natural Singer workshop with Claude Stein at Kripalu.  While I remember most of the techniques, I did sign up for the online lessons; I receive a new video or audio file each week for a year.  So there are a lot of "mmmm" and "ahh" and "nyawn" around here.  And more actual singing, too.  (Learn more about Stein and his workshops here.)  I haven't been to the musical Taize service recently, but I love the singing meditations we do.

Auditions for the school musical were last week.  Both kids tried out; neither wanted us to hear their practice song.  I was even helping out at auditions but didn't really hear them.  Sis sang Cohen's "Hallelujah," which they'd sung at the marvelous school music concert a few weeks ago.  Bud did "My Shot" from Hamilton.  The director said we should YouTube it and send it to Miranda, which was kind to say.  But Bud does remember a lot of lyrics and performs with gusto.  And both kids will be in the musical, though Sis just wants a background part.  Bud goes for callbacks today; he'd like something a little more.  And he moves well.  We'll see.  A little speaking part would thrill him.  From here, we have about four months of weekly rehearsals.  So, lots of music, lots of the time.

Bud and I still take piano, though Sis decided not to this year.  He's been playing "Memory" from Cats and "Winter Wind" by the Piano Guys, a long, lovely, and complicated piece.  I think the Cats song brings out his melancholy about dear Mo and Mr. P, who died a year ago.  He plays, is reflective for a bit, and then perks right up.  I'm practicing "The Entertainer" and it's coming along slowly; I'm also trying to put my favorite "Finlandia" into memory--that goes even more slowly, though I've been playing it for two years.

Sis has been focused on her violin, which she plays in her room.  As I mentioned, there was a concert a few weeks back, both choral and strings.  Sis is in the first violin group and Bud is one of the only cellos, both in the advanced (5th & 6th grades) orchestra.  They both plan to continue playing in junior high but are not sure if they will still be serious in high school.  See, only one high school in town has strings, so their interest becomes more broadly important.  Well, if we even still have public schools by then, with public-school enemy #1, DeVos, as Secretary of Education.

And we all like listening to music on our Sonos, a digital device which handles our music library.  I can call up any song we own while seated on the couch and choose where in the house to play it and how loud, creating my own playlists.  It's fantastic!  Hamilton has long been in the queue, sometimes current pop songs.  And I have been listening to the medieval chants of Hildegard von Bingen.  No doubt we'll put Sunset Boulevard into rotation soon.  We have tickets to see Glenn Close in a few weeks.

Then, who knows what, but you can bet there will still be song here.

"Sing Out, Louise!"

Loved the clouds and mist--and this was the non-foggy day!

What an amazing weekend at Kripalu!!  So much to tell you about my singing workshop and the weekend itself.

Way back in fifth grade, as we prepared to enter sixth, I considered joining the junior high school choir because I loved to sing.  But a friend warned me off, saying you had to sing alone in front of the whole choir.  That did it; I signed up for art and spent months drawing a single bottle with a pencil.  Blah.  I tried singing again in Chicago in the all-women Artemis Singers but didn't stay with it too long because I was too self-conscious.  (And practices were far away.)  And so, as an adult, I've fulfilled my love of singing at home with the family casually, in the car to the radio, at church for 2-3 hymns a week, and as a Girl Scout leader.  I'm a great group singer--I just follow along, with more enthusiasm than talent.  I'm terrible with lyrics but very good at inventing them.

And I sing to my hospice patients.  Once patients pass a certain point on their dying journey, they don't really respond to conversation anymore.  But they like to feel a visitor's presence and so I sing.  I try to sing soft things--"Amazing Grace," if they are religious (there are sometimes rosaries or prayer cards and the like on the nightstand), or familiar songs like "Simple Gifts" and "Love Me Tender."  I carry the lyrics around in case I forget.  Sometimes I sing for 30 minutes or more, moving into lullabies, folk songs, and various simple chants.  And I repeat.

When I saw that Kripalu offered The Natural Singer workshop, I decided to take it--to boost my confidence and to acquire some singing techniques, skills, warm ups that would stand me in good stead.  And it did all that and more.

Of course, when I signed up way back when, I had no idea there would be a Woman's March (much less not a woman president.)  Sigh.  Marching isn't my thing, physically, so I didn't cancel the class.

The Workshop

Saw lots of fun patterns for Zentangle

There were 30 people in our group, ranging from little singing ability to professional (albeit ones who desired improvement); only three were men.  I was definitely one of the youngest, with maybe two or three others--the rest were in their 50s and 60s.  Almost all white.  (So, very much like Kripalu itself--middle aged, white, female.)

Our teacher was Claude Stein, an industry professional who has worked as a vocal coach, producer, and now, in addition, teaches these workshops to encourage non- and budding professionals.  He says he tried his hand at writing but found he could make a career out of vocal coaching.  His ear and his skill with impromptu piano playing were impressive!

I don't want to say too much about the class itself, knowing that he offers it several times a year and earns his livelihood from it, in part.  Besides, I'm not really qualified to accurately describe the theories and practices.

So, the class was organized around warm ups and exercises AND personal vocal coaching.  For the first two of ten hours, we learned ways to improve our voice, our instrument.  Mainly, we focused on lowering the voice box, checking pitch, loosening our jaws, etc., through "nyawn," "MMMmmmm," "bum bum bum," "eh-gah-eh," lip thrills, etc.  We also did a lot of call and response, repeat-after-me singing.  And we even paired up with another person and sang directly to them.

Together, we sang alleluia, "We Shall Overcome," "This Little Light of Mine," "How Could Anyone?," and, one of my new favorites, "It's in Every One of Us."  Yes, lots of relatively liberal, feel-good songs that we sing at my Unitarian Universalist church, too--perfect for the day of the inauguration and the day of the Women's March.

We started each session with some exercises and some group singing.  And then we had vocal coaching.  I sang "Mama Loves Me," by Deidre McCalla, the lullaby about two mothers and their rainbow-color kids.  I know it backwards and forwards and thought I could sing it without panicking. I'd considered "Water is Wide" and "Summertime" but wasn't confident of the lyrics under pressure.

Oh, the pressure.  I was so nervous.  And it actually got worse as I sang, so that my voice shook.  And I got teared up.  It wasn't just singing in front of people, or singing the song from the kiddos' babyhood; it was also having discussed my hospice work beforehand.  "So," he asked, "yours is probably the last song they hear?" or something to that effect.  Yeah, I hadn't quite considered it that way.  But yes, I have sung in several cases the last music patients have heard, to the best of my knowledge (I'm rarely there at the very end.)  He said more than once that I did good, important work.  And immediately, a few of my class started tearing up (especially when I did, but several of us were cryers.)

Oddly, really oddly, I sang so much higher than I usually do.  I don't know if I started off to high or if it was the physiology of it--he suggested it was the energy of the moment, when I asked--but he said "the fragile thing" worked for my voice and needs.  Can't usually belt or jam out in a hospice setting, it's true.  And so I practiced gentleness, smoothness, tenderness.  He applauded that I sang right through the emotion, that I just kept going even when it made my voice unreliable.  He tried to get me to dispel my fears with some call-and-response, first loud (even with stomping my foot and belting) and then softly ("I have the voice of an angel.  I bring love.  I bring peace.")  It was all very emotional.  (Three people came up to me afterwards, two with hospice stories, and one with a bisexual daughter.  It meant a lot to me to talk to them.)


It was easier to listen to, learn from, and clap for everyone else once I was done!  He met each person where she or he was (we had let him know what we wanted--I wanted more confidence and skill to sing to my hospice patients), from beginner all the way to pro.  And he was always encouraging, even when he was fierce or funny or had us say "fuck!"  I learned so much just listening--and there was some great music and new songs and touching breakthroughs.

On Saturday night, many of the group met informally for karaoke.  We sang a lot of women's empowerment music--"I Will Survive," "Natural Woman," "These Boots were Made for Walking," etc.  I sang both "Cottonfields" and "Summertime" a cappella, just because I didn't want to have to chase the karaoke accompaniment.  And this time my voice was more like my regular singing voice, lower.  But with more resonance--all those low voice box and jaw exercises.  I liked it.  And these women were fun--we laughed and sang and cheered together for two hours.

I can already tell that I have more confidence in my singing, not because I'm that much better, but because I know I enjoy it and that there really isn't anything to be embarrassed about--even if I go higher than I'm used to, forget the lyrics, bottom out on the low notes, get off key, or forget the tune.  It's more about my passion and emotional expression.  And that is a priceless gift from this weekend.

Even better:  I signed up for weekly online exercises, particularly because I know I'll forget aspects of the ones we tried.  I've already practiced today!  (Don't laugh, but I think there have been two unexpected benefits:  singing exercises my core AND the jaw and throat exercises seem to have helped the ear pressure which contributed to my hearing loss issues!!!)  I've also made a Kripalu play list with some of the songs people sang this weekend, many of which were new to me--"How Can I Keep From Singing?," "Give Yourself to Love," "Moonshadow."  I love learning new songs.

We ended the weekend with a sing along, finishing with Kate Wolf's "Give Yourself to Love," which really encapsulated the weekend.

Kind friends all gathered 'round, there's something I would say:
That what brings us together here has blessed us all today.
Love has made a circle that holds us all inside.
Where strangers are as family, loneliness can't hide.
You must give yourself to love if love is what you're after;
Open up your hearts to the tears and laughter
And give yourself to love, give yourself to love.
I've walked these mountains in the rain and learned to love the wind;
I've been up before the sunrise to watch the day begin.
I've always knew I'd find you, though I never did know how;
Like sunshine on a cloudy day stand before me now.
So give yourself to love if love is what you're after;
Open up your hearts to the tears and laughter
And give yourself to love, give yourself to love.
Love is born in fire; it's planted like a seed.
Love can't give you everything, but it gives you what you need.
And love comes when you're ready, love comes when you're afraid;
It'll be your greatest teacher, the best friend you have made.
So give yourself to love if love is what you're after;
Open up your hearts to the tears and laughter
And give yourself to love, give yourself to love.
Give yourself to love if love is what you're after;
Open up your hearts to the tears and laughter
And give yourself to love, give yourself to love

Kripalu
And you know I love many aspects of Kripalu--the food, the labyrinth, the amazing mountain scenery, the gift shop!  Yeah, it's a little hard for me to be around all those extremely fit bodies in extremely revealing Lycra yoga clothes.  At least it was winter and they were more covered up--no mid-drifts or obvious camel-toes because of the long shirts.  If I didn't have body issues, being at Kripalu would probably give me some--though, no one treated me any differently.

Some of the food:

• breakfast:  masala soy chai, steel cut oatmeal, quinoa or millet "cream," egg bakes with turkey bacon or kale and the like, buckwheat blueberry muffins, Kripalu granola, roasted potatoes.
• lunch and dinner:  mixed greens with House Dressing, macaroni and cheese, squash "mac", pad thai, Sesame Tofu, chipotle chicken, sauteed kale, roasted roots, curried egg salad, vegan spread, chicken with green peppercorn sauce, white fish with fennel and onion, and others I can't recall now . . . 
• Iced Moroccan Mint tea, vanilla cake, banana bread with whipped cream

And, for the first time, I did Yoga Dance (with teacher Michelle Dalbec.)  I'm not sure how to explain it.  It's more interpretive dance than yoga, in that there are no poses or choreography.  You respond to prompts--make a pattern with your feet or your arms, use your left side or your right mainly, dance to the rhythm, dance the spirit of forgiveness . . . I can't think of all the prompts.  She quoted Jewel Mathieson's poem about high-powered dance, referred to the 5Rhythms work of Gabrielle Roth, even quoted Stravinsky ("I haven't understood a bar of music in my life, but I have felt it.")  All these women dancing their dance to the music.  I found it all very freeing, especially a spoken word performance by John De Kadt called "I am" ("I am not healed.  I am not broken.  I am not my story.  I am not my pain. etc"  And I danced and danced.  And with all that arm waving and foot tapping, it was a bit of a workout, too.

Why dance? 
This dance floor, my canvass, my playground
my therapist, my lover, my meditation, my church
The keys to the kingdom are rattling in my chest
the breath, lifeline to the divine
I come here for the caress of holy spirit thru my body
to feel the beloved in my blood, for a transfusion of light
I come here for the higher powered dance
To feel God's love blazing in my body
salvation from my small self
this body, kindling for this fire, this rhythm refuge
every beat and rest of one heart
this is my tribal church, my communion
this monastery of mind
this holy place in my heart
this pagoda in my palm alms
this sanctuary in my spine a sacrifice
this temple in my torso testifying
this shrine in chakra number three freeing
this higher powered dance
this, this is why I'm here
this is why we're here
for THIS dance
Jewel Mathieson

I also attended an evening Yoga Nidra, or sleepy yoga, session.  I'd done a bit of yoga nidra at another retreat.  You pretty much fall asleep for a short nap, complete with a warm blanket (and, this time, and eye cover) to the gentle voice of the teacher doing a guided meditation in a room with lots of other people.  They say you don't actually fall asleep--something about theta waves or whatever.  But some people were snoring and I definitely checked out awhile.  It is extremely relaxing, so that you have this heavy calmness afterwards.  I got a CD for Mama to use when she can't sleep (though, it didn't work on Bud last night!) I went to sleep not long afterwards.  

And the labyrinth--I walked it twice!  Even with the overcast, drippy but not actually chilly (until the last day) weather (besides, I like looking at lots of gray cloud layers.)  I just love walking labyrinths.  And this is a good one, with neat, even paths and nice shrubs; no wildflowers this time of year.  Nor did I see the mama bear and cub that apparently hibernate on the property (and who have been seen recently.)  On my first walk, I introduced a woman to labyrinths who was walking for the first time--she was confusing it with a maze and was afraid she would get lost.  I told her she wouldn't and that there were only two real guidelines--step out of the way if you pass someone and walk in quiet if not silence (yeah, she was chatting with me a lot, but we were the only two there so I helped.)  Otherwise, I told her it could be seen as a metaphor for life and that she just had to walk her own path.  I forgot to tell her about leaving an offering/trinket in the middle, but I know she stood and stared at the collection.  I had an art rock for each visit.  After she left, I sang my metta meditation chant as I walked:

May all beings be happy,
all beings be at peace.
May all beings be happy,
all beings be at peace.
All free from suffering,
all free from suffering.
All beings be happy,
all beings be at peace.
(Kristopher Lindquist)

My second walk was with Mama, who joined me on Monday for lunch and a few hours on site before driving home.   We always walk separately, but I still love sharing labyrinths with her.  She liked it and the food and the view.  I know she'd never take the singing workshop, but maybe we can go to Kripalu together sometime.

And I know there will be lots of singing before that.

-=-=-=-=-=-=-

Thai Sesame Tofu--approximation of Kripalu recipe
l package firm tofu
6 TBS each of: tamari, brown rice vinegar, toasted sesame oil
1/2 cup water
1-2 TBS white wine
2 TBS chopped ginger
2 TBS chopped garlic
1 1/2-2 TBS honey
Toasted sesame seeds
Canola or other flavorless oil for greasing the pan                      

Dice the tofu into approximately 1″ squares. Combine all the ingredients in a large bowl. Add the tofu and marinate for 30-60 minutes. Drain tofu and place the cubes on lightly oiled baking pan.  Bake at 350 degrees for 30 minutes.

(Alternative:  1/2-1 cup extra firm tofu in 1/2" cubes,  marinated in 1 tsp soy sauce for approx. ten minutes.   Bake at 350 degrees for 45 min)

Kripalu House Dressing

Makes about 2 cups

1 cup sunflower oil or grape seed oil
2 tablespoons toasted sesame oil
¼ cup tamari (natural soy sauce)
¼ cup lemon juice
1/3 cup sesame tahini
2 cloves garlic
½ tablespoon dry mustard powder
½ teaspoon salt
½ tablespoon chili powder
pinch cayenne
½ cup water

Combine all ingredients and blend using a standard blender or immersion blender.

Kripalu Moroccan Mint Tea

Makes 6 cups

6½ cups water
½ cup fresh mint (stems and all), washed
2 tablespoons or 6 tea bags green tea
1 to 2 tablespoons sweetener of choice (organic sugar, agave, or honey)

Bring water to a boil. Turn off heat, add mint, and allow to steep for five minutes. Return to a boil, turn off heat, and add tea. Allow tea to steep no more than three minutes. (Green tea becomes bitter when steeped too long.) Remove tea and mint; sweeten to taste. Serve hot, or make iced tea by refrigerating until cold, or pouring cooled tea over ice.

Masala Chai

Makes about 4 cups.

2 tablespoons whole cardamom
2 teaspoons whole cloves
2 cinnamon sticks
1 whole stars of anise
1/2 teaspoon whole black peppercorns
1 tablespoon slice fresh ginger
4 black tea bags
2 cups milk (or substitute soy milk)
2 cups water
1 to 3 tablespoons sweetener of choice

Combine all spices and tie them in a cheesecloth. Using a rolling pin or other heavy utensil, lightly pound the spices to crush them slightly. Place milk, water, and spices in the cheesecloth in a pot and bring to a boil. Reduce heat and let simmer for 15 minutes. Bring water back to a boil, turn off, and add black tea. Let steep for 5 minutes, then strain. Add sweetener of choice and stir to dissolve. Serve warm, or chill over ice for a cooling afternoon treat.

Viva la Vie Boheme!

Opera!  We went to the opera!

And we took the kiddos.

It was marvelous.

Mama loves La Boheme (and yes, I know, accents, but I'm not going to figure that out now.)  She has been listening to it for years now, and particularly likes right when Rudolfo meets Mimi, "Non sono in vena" and "Si, mi chiamano Mimi."

And so we decided to go.  And to take the kids. You know, another great cultural experience.  The Met Opera puts the opera on most years; it's one of the classic ABCs--Aida, Boheme, and Carmen.  And they still show the Franco Zefferelli production, which is the same one I saw about twenty-five years ago.  It hasn't aged at all.  Mama hadn't ever seen it.  In fact, we've only been to the opera a couple of times--once in Chicago we saw part of Tosca, with free tickets from a docent, but left after the first act because we were ready to leave.  And we saw Die Fledermaus back in 1994/95.  I remember it mainly because I love the music and Dom Deluise had a role in it that night.

I had gone through my opera phase back in my grad school days.  I think it started with Moonstruck, that wonderful NYC film with Cher and Olympia Dukakis.  I think I got a lot of ideas about NYC from the film long before I moved there.  Including the magnificence of the Met.  I remember seeing the spread for the opera season in The New York Times, with all these different ticket sets--Italian trios, German trios, classic trios.  And for about $20, I could get a Family Circle seat; I bought a set each semester, as I recall, going to the box office itself to book my seats (the olden days!)   I loved it.  La Boheme.  Die Fledermaus.  The Barber of Seville.  Tosca.  The Marriage of Figaro.  Carmen.  I would swear I saw Jessye Norman in Carmen, but I can't find proof that she performed that role in the early 90s when I was going.  I thought it was marvelous.  I have also seen Aida, but in Rome, in the Baths of Caracalla.  I loved it, too, especially outdoors in that setting on a gorgeous Roman summer night.

I was thrilled to go to the opera with Mama and the kids, to share the experience I had enjoyed so well.  The architecture of Lincoln Center, inspired by the Capitoline Hill (yep, in Rome.)  The fountain.  The huge paintings by Marc Chagall.  The glorious crystal chandeliers.  The red velvet.  The men in tuxedoes and women in fashionable gowns.  The old, elaborate costumes on exhibit. The balcony where you can go during the two intermissions.  The little shop (it was a subway-level shop, with a tiny one near the box office; now there's only a big one near the box office.) The xylophone gong.  The restaurant with meals served during intermissions.  The proscenium sculpture.  The caption screens in front of each seat.  The way the chandeliers dim and rise before curtain.  The huge curtains.  That deep stage.  Oh, and the operas themselves--sets, costumes, over-the-top stories, and all that singing without microphones.

 there it was, La Boheme, as wonderful as I recall.  Mama loved it.  I loved it.  We both cried.  And the kids liked it, which is pretty good for a three-hour show sung in Italian, with lots of romance and kissing.  They had my little birding binoculars and monocular, which helped entertain them.  I enjoyed it without them.  The garret set, with the chimneys of Paris in the back.  The stove lit by a play.  Mimi's costume.  The amazing cafe set, with its two levels and dozens of extras.  Love those extras (including a children's chorus), in rich period clothes, doing what we termed "operatic mannequin challenge" during Musetta's song.  The donkey and horse who are part of the first act.  All that snow and fuzzy light of the third act.  And back to the garret again.  I wondered if Mimi's muff ever accidentally rolled off her hand and off the roof of the garret!  I'm sure somewhere in its 100+-year production history, it's happened.

We talked over the opera in our room at the Empire Hotel across the street and the next morning at Smith's for brunch (mmmm, lemony pancakes with whipped ricotta!!)  We had hoped to stay and do town, but all that wonderful aforementioned snow was already falling and with totals upped to around 7", we headed home.

Listening to Maria Callas as Mimi . . . .

Indigo Children

Thursday night was a momentous occasion for us:  we took the kids to their first major concert.  Even better, it was the Indigo Girls!!!

Mama and I have seen the Girls in concert 6 or so times together:

• Suffragette Sessions (but so few IG songs), Aug. 1998
• Chicago Theater, Dec. 1999
• Ravinia, June 2000
• Honor the Earth concert, Oct. 2000
• Radio City (this date, perhaps), June 2002
• Ridgefield (link to set list here), July 2008
• plus Mama saw them at Earth Jam and Radio City Music Hall (April and June 1994)

The Indigo Girls provide the soundtrack of our romance, from early mix tapes with "Love Will Come to You" and those first concerts, always the songs on the tape player then CD player then MP3 player now Sonos wifi.  We've been listening for roughly twenty years (Mama more, me a bit less.)  Mama knows the lyrics; I don't as much, but I will make them up, and I can never name a song until its chorus.  There are lines in several of their songs that always make us stop and look at each other in that special way, hold hands, kiss, chuckle--"beautiful women walk on by; you know I never know what to say" from "Shame on You," "I took you for better and took you for worse; don't you ever forget it" from "Power of Two," and "Every lesson learned a line on your beautiful face" from "Get Out the Map," to name a few (I bet I didn't get all of those lyrics correct, either.)  So many memories wrapped up in their music.  And we have just begun sharing the songs with the kiddos.

We would have laughed had you told us back at one of those early concerts that we'd be taking our own kids to an IG show.  In fact, we tried to do it about a year and a half ago, only to realize we were going to be in England!  So when tickets came available for this show, we got four.  And we started to play the music everyday to familiarize them with more of the IG repertoire.  Sis liked "Galileo" and Bud liked "Get out the Map."

With the show starting at 8 and the Girls not going on until 9, we waited til after rush hour to head to the city, listening to the music all the way.  The kids are more used to Broadway and so couldn't understand why we arrived late (really, on time) and skipped the opening band.  We had told them they could sing, dance, even talk, that people would drink and move about, nothing like Broadway.

Then there they were, Amy on our left and Emily on our right, playing our favorite "Get Out the Map."  What a fantastic show it was!  So many of our favorites-- (I'll drop the quotes for simplicity) Get Out the Map, Power of Two, Shame on You, Go, Love Will Come to You, Galileo, Oziline, and of course Closer to Fine, plus Mama loves Land of Canaan--and several of the new songs.  The kids clapped and sang along and swayed to the music, but also closed their eyes "just to rest" part way through during some of the slow songs.  Mama and I gave that look and, several times, I got all teary. I felt so young again, but also in a time warp with two ten-year-old kids with us.

It was fun to explain aspects of their concerts to the kids--how they always stand on the same side of the stage, how they switched guitars every song, how Sully was the one who had been tuning their guitars for decades, how they always encouraged new or young talent and frequently brought them and other friends on stage for a song (often "Closer to Fine"), how they often had the audience sing parts of their songs, how we think they never sing out the "F" word in "Shame on You," how Amy doesn't usually sing the line about "it's only life after all," even how my friend Miss M once sat with them on the curb after a concert at our university some 25+ years ago.  And now, in the age of FB, how they put their set lists on line:

The concert ended with the usual encore of "Closer to Fine" and we were all up out of our seats singing, the kids getting their second wind.  We left the theater singing and sang halfway home, until they fell asleep in the back.    Mama and I shared all sorts of old memories--of concerts, of lyrics, of times we listened to their music (on any car trip in the late 1990s, especially from Chicago to NYC in 2001.) We hummed their songs all weekend in Block Island. If they didn't have uniforms, we would've gotten the kids concert t-shirts to wear just like we would have as teens on the day after.  It's a sure beginning to their own great memories of the Indigo Girls, second-generation fans who are starting their own personal soundtracks.

Summer Fun: Musical Mondays

So the beauty of digital music is being able to group by genre and create playlists and mixes.  We have hundreds, if not thousands, of songs in genres from Broadway to Celtic, sea music to classical, American folk to "world," 1930s to current pop, plus lists of the Indigo Girls, the Andrews Sisters, Beatles, Elvis, Cher, Simon and Garfunkel, and Peter, Paul, and Mary, and more.

And now, to take advantage of our wide swath of music, we have "musical Mondays."  We choose a genre and randomly sort the whole playlist and listen till we're sick of it.  We've done Celtic (especially the soundtrack of The Secret of Roan Inish after we watched the movie), 80s music,  New Orleans jazz (which is Mama's favorite music when it's hot or we're eating muffulettas!), patriotic music for the 4th, and Broadway, since we're putting together a Broadway/Times Square puzzle.

I watched Annie Lennox sing blues on "Great Perfromances" and loved the music, even the heart-wrenching "Strange Fruit," about lynchings in the South.  There's a reason she's been called the "greatest white soul singer."  Maybe I can sneak it in with Mama's jazz playlist (once I figure out how to manipulate Sonos and the NAS.)

We also have "Kids Pop" playlists with our favorite current songs on it--we just added Kelly Clarkson's "Heartbeat Song" and Rachel Platten's "Fight Song."  Sis likes "Riptide" and "Pompeii," both of which she wants to play on the piano.  Bud likes "Uptown Funk," when he's not listening to Broadway.  I like all of those and also switch between the 1930s soundtrack to the "Miss Fisher Mysteries" and all of the Piano Guys.

When we had 80s night, I couldn't recall the name of the song that I never remember.  I hear it on the radio and have even once called Mama to say, "this is the song."  Was it "Everybody Wants to Rule the World" or "If You Leave" or "Always Someone There to Remind Me," or "Don't You Forget About Me" or something else?  I like it, but it somehow always slips through my mental cracks.  And so a few days later, we were in the car and I started thinking of this mystery song and, just as I thought of the lyrics "if you wait around awhile . . . (something something something) I promise you."  Yes, "The Promise!"  And just as I thought of it, it came on the radio!  The kids didn't believe that I was psychic that way.  So I called Mama and we laughed at the song.  Now it's on the 80s playlist.

Sure, there are some frustrations:  our playlists are way longer than would fit on a CD for the car, because my car doesn't support digital music.  And sometimes the sorting is off (for instance, half of Evita is missing right now.)  Or a dud sneaks in (we picked up White Snake somewhere.  Nope.)  But otherwise, we have hundreds of years of music from all over the world (Peruvian flutists or Inuit throat singers, anyone?  Vera Lynn or Madonna or Katie Perry?  Sweet Honey in the Rock or Raffi?  Hildegard von Bingen or Liszt or Paul Winter Consort?  "Simple Gifts" or "The Golden Vanity?"  Soundtracks from Star Wars, Lord of the Rings, Little Women, Last of the Mohicans?  I could go on and on) at our fingertips and listen to it when we're cooking, playing games, doing puzzles, or discussing a place or time period.  I love it.

Hey Ho

Undeterred by my nerves at my piano recital, I'm still taking lessons.  And learning a new skill!  Up to now, I've been reading music, your typical piano sheet music with treble and bass clefs.  I have dabbled with fake books, where they give you the melodies and the chords are noted above.  Now I'm learning the opposite--I have a chord sheet for "Ho Hey" by the Lumineers, so that I play the chords and either sing or pick out the melody on my own.  It'll help me learn my chords well, especially having to invert them.  I don't really have an ear to pick out the melody myself so we'll have to see what happens.  But I'm excited about the challenge.

Especially because the next recital is almost seven months away and I won't be playing and singing!

Music to Our Ears

Last night, the kiddos had their first Beginning Orchestra concert.  Very similar to their Beginning Strings concert last year, they played three songs, including one that was just scales.  I don't remember last year's much, except that I teared up and that Bud's cello ended up in the auditorium (cellists leave their instruments on the side of the stage, per teacher's instruction, to pick up after the concert, but we were leaving earlier; many others were in the same boat.)

This year's concert was almost exactly the same and, despite prior knowledge, his cello still sat in the auditorium until later in the evening.  But we were prepared.  The kids brought decks of cards to do magic trick swith their friends  During the concert,  Bud sat as first cellists--there are only two--and Sis said seats weren't earned but were based on sitting next to someone you wouldn't chat with.  I guess Bud is too chatty even to sit next to the viola-players.    Sis is nestled amid the violinists so that all you can see are her bangs; she too is chatty apparently and wasn't sitting next to any of the friends I know.

The songs were "Jingle Bells" and "Ole Joe Clark" which I have heard dozens and dozens of times on various instruments.  Music only parents would clap for.

Still, it's a great opportunity, this elementary school orchestra and I look forward to many more.

Even if we'll always have to wait to retrieve the cello.

Music Mystery

My piano lessons are going swimmingly.  I'm playing several fun ditties--"Cuckoo Clock," "Beautiful Brown Eyes," and "Alpine" something-or-other, from my Adult All-in-One Piano book.  And I've added several Christmas carols to the mix--"Jingle Bells," "Joy to the World," "Jolly Old St Nicholas," "O Christmas Tree," and "Deck the Halls."

But occasionally my mind wanders back to music I played 20+ years ago the first time I took piano lessons, for two or so months, after college (I think it was.)   They weren't great lessons; he was a young and unchallenging teacher, not really stressing that I learn to count or keep time.  But we rushed through all the major keys and I photocopied lots of songs I liked.  There were a few that stuck with me--"Musette" by Bach, a piece called "The Knight and the Lady," and this other piece, which sheet music I had lost (which I swore had a picture of a castle on it.)  I could sort of remember the tune, but not enough to play it, mainly because I don't play that well and I don't easily parse music into notes.

I looked in our books and online and finally realized that the book the music was in was John Thompson Modern Piano Course, which also had the aforementioned "The Knight and Lady.".  And when I showed Mama the cover on Amazon, she said she had  used that book as a child!  Which of course meant she still had it; I found it in a minute, down with the other piano books in the basement bookcase.  I flipped through it hurriedly, passing "The Knight and the Lady" but not finding the piece with the castle I remembered (there was a castle drawing, on another song.  See I'm more visual than auditory.)

I remembered that it might have been in one of the old costume dramas that I love, something based on Jane Austen . . . was it perhaps a minuet?  Did Margaret Dashwood play it?  Did Lizzie Bennet, only tolerably?  No searches yielded much help.  (But I liked this.)

So I went to the piano and began to fiddle with it.  Amazingly, I seemed to catch the cadence and soon had an idea of how it went, maybe even remembering playing it.  Mama wrote the notes down as I called them out, really simply:  e f e g g,  d e d f f, c c d d e, g f e d.  It sounded real, better than I could have made up in my head for sure, but she didn't recognize it.  And so I let it slide.

Until we came upstairs and I googled, "how to search for sheet music by notes" and came up with Musicpedia, which has a "Name that Tune" search.  I typed in my song with the notes Mama wrote down and kept trying to search.  And odd songs were coming up in the search results.  But I had all half notes.  And that isn't really what they are.  So I tried to guess when they were quarters and half and such, to make it sound like a melody--amazingly, the website let's you play what you come up with so I could tweak it.  But it took a long time to make it sound as close as I could recall.
 
And about an hour into this effort of tweaking and adjusting, it came up with this:

Mozart, Wolfgang Amadeus: piano sonata No. 11 in A K331, 1st movement
 

I was off two notes and in the wrong key, but it looked promising.  But my computer wouldn't play the melody from Musicpedia, so I found Mozart's sonata on YouTube:

That's THE SONG!!!!!

And guess what?  It is in the Thompson book!  Called "Air by Mozart," only there's not a picture of a castle.  (I guess my visual memory failed me where my auditory one didn't.)

But it is on the page opposite "The Knight and the Lady."

Talk about an earworm.

But I'm just absolutely astonished that a.) I could figure out the tune well enough to search for it (yay for my piano lessons!) and b.) that the computer could make sense of what I typed.  Isn't the internet amazing??

Do You Hear the People Sing?

Yep, we're singing . . . "One Day More," "Master of the House," "I Dreamed a Dream," "On My Own," "Who am I?," "Bring Him Home," "Red and Black."

But not "Castle on a Cloud"--none of us like that song.  And we all laughed when Madam Thernardier mocked it!

We went to see Les Miserables on Broadway this weekend.  And it was fabulous!!!  It is Mama's favorite show, one she was quite taken with as a teenager.  She's seen it in the theater several times--even once in French in Montreal!--and owns numerous recordings (including French, Dutch, and now Spanish.)  She can't abide the movie because it rejects the usual theater conventions (and has mediocre singers.)  In fact, she wasn't sure she wanted to see the new production because, among other things, it didn't have the iconic revolving stage.

But I talked her into it, saying this might be the only chance the kids have, for years, to see her all-time favorite musical.  And even if it's not as great as the original production, at least it's not, ahem, the film.  And she relented, out of curiosity and desire.

And while she did miss the revolving stage and bemoaned the slimmer production values, she did like the show and was especially gratified that the kids loved it, too.  We had spent the week prepping them--playing the concerts on tv, summarizing the characters and plots, and prepping them about the sex (prostitutes, penis-size jokes) and violence (almost everybody dies.)  We even said, that on the off-chance they got lost by it all, to just enjoy the music and the production and not worry about who's who and what's what.

No worries, there.  They followed it all and even noticed a few minor changes from the concerts (like who sings the line about the Captain wearing his shoes.)  And we were all impressed by Ramin Karimloo, who played Valjean.  (We knew him from the Phantom 25th anniversary concert and also as Enjolras in the Les Mis 25th concert.)  Such a strong yet tender voice.  We also really liked Will Swenson as Javert.  And Nikki James as Eponine.  Really, they were all good.  And I liked the gritty realism of the costumes and sets and even the lighting; but then, the show has always had a serious dark side.  And it took all my powers not to sob outloud at my favorite line, "to love another person is to see the face of God."  I'm tearing up just thinking about it.

Whew.  After the show, we went for our traditional post-theater snack at Junior's--cheesecakes, egg cream soda, and cel-ray soda.  We didn't stagedoor because it was a matinee and many of the performers don't appear.

We stayed in Union Square this trip, far from the bed bugs in Times Square.  The kids liked the neighborhood--Forbidden  Planet, the Strand bookstore, Max Brenner chocolate restaurant.  Even the Whole Foods was more interesting than ours!  And we had a great view of the park and also the World Trade Center/Freedom Tower (I don't know what we're supposed to call it, but I don't really like FT), glittering in the distance.  Oh, the noise, though.  Even six stories up, we heard loud drunk people and car horns all night, much worse than Times Square.  But still, no bed bugs (yet.  We took all the precautions and are boiling everything here at home.)

And the next day was Comic Con, but that's a separate post . . . .

Piano Pride

I've started piano lessons!

Yep, having that nice, new piano just sitting in the living room, silent all day while the kids are in school (because, when Bud gets home, it's not silent much until bedtime!), I decided to take lessons.  With our current, peripatetic piano teacher. She usually teaches kids but expanded this fall to include adults.  And so two of my friends whose kids study with the teacher are taking, too.  I've even heard we might have wine-and-music evenings INSTEAD of recitals!

And so I've begun.

I took piano the first time 20+ years ago, for three months one summer before grad school.  With a teacher--a young man at the local music studio--who was still in high school, I believe!  Sure, I learned some notes, I even learned hand positions for all of the keys and could cross over during some songs, but we never did any counting (like with a metronome), nor did we ever do any harmony or chords. This meant I could only play what I already knew and it was always pretty simple with only one note at a time.   I can't recall if that was at my request or he didn't manage to teach me counting and chords, but looking back it seems like we rushed ahead in some areas and stayed way behind in others.

Now, we're doing it right.

Of course, I have no illusions about being a master piano player.  I just want to be able to sit down and play a few songs, even from memory.  Simple folk songs, definitely Christmas songs.  Maybe "Happy Birthday."  In talking with the teacher, we're wondering if I should learn chords so that I can play from a fake book--simple harmonies alongside simple melodies, should sound good.

I think the teacher was surprised that I could actually recall the notes of the treble clef and figured out the bass clef if I went slowly enough.  I think I was surprised, too.

The kids were surprised most of all, I think, when I sat down and plinked out "Aura Lee" (aka "Love Me Tender") this morning.  Bud is ready to teach me his songs!

I think I have a ways to go with that.

Summer Fun: My Mantra

"The heart may freeze or it can burn
The pain will ease if I can learn
There is no future
There is no past

I live this moment as my last
There's only us
There's only this
Forget regret
Or life is yours to miss
No other road

No other way
No day but today."

--"Another Day", Rent (Jonathan Larson)

We've been singing Broadway musicals here recently, from Wicked, Phantom of the Opera, and a few from Rent (which the kiddos are too young to see just yet.)  And so when the time came for me to pick a mantra for my Summer Soul Camp experience--a week-long, web-based spiritual community that focuses on recreation and renewal for adults, i.e. "camp," created by Heather Bruggeman of Beauty That Moves (you'll recall that I've taken several of her classes before, including 30- Day Vegan, Whole Food Kitchen, and the winter "camp" Hibernate)--I chose one of the lyrics from Rent:  No day but today.

It's the modern, NYC/Broadway equivalent of carpe diem, and has a catchy tune, if you know the song, making it easy to remember throughout the ten-day experience.  And I've needed it.  As I mentioned here earlier this week and perhaps a few times before, my back is in a frustrating place.  From the high of our trip to England through the challenges of the five-week tour season at the historic house and to the multiple end-of-year activities, including the kung fu tournament near Phillie, up to and including my new aqua therapy routine, my back has gone from great to good to eh.  I've worn my brace more and taken more pills, both painkillers and muscle relaxers (I've never missed the NSAIDs I'm allergic to so much), than I have in years, which isn't a great sign.  But it's not as bad as it's ever been, not nearly so--I can still drive and sit and walk, and even fold clothes, feed the cats, and unload the dishwasher (and yes, I still feel grateful about those things everyday), so it's really all relative.  It's just taking all my learned mindfulness skills to work through the discomfort and inconvenience in order to continue to enjoy the summer without being limited by pain and fear.  That's no small task sometimes, especially at the end of the day.

And the mantra has helped.  While it could be perceived as hedonistic or narcissistic, the mantra to me speaks of staying in the present and not worrying about the past or the future (or the past repeating itself in the future, for me).  It reminds me to do what I can today, both things that are fun and enjoyable and those that help make me feel better.  And when the pain comes, focusing on the here and now, as emphasized in Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction (MBSR), eases its sting.

I haven't been able to do every camp activity--I didn't make the market tote or the prayer flags, yet--but I have been trying to embrace the idea of adult R&R through simple, focused activities.  So today, even with some discomfort and later my brace, I explored the full range of summer possibilities with the kiddos:

• opened up the house and turned off the AC because it was only 65F overnight;
• went to aqua therapy and then extra swimming with the kiddos;
• played several games of cards, including Slap Jack, War, and Slamwich, their new favorite;
• read several chapters in Lark Rise to Candleford, the semi-autobiographical, nostalgic, rural 19th-century trilogy from England (as seen on PBS, though I'm told the show isn't much like the book);
• sketched in the yard with the kiddos for half the afternoon--Sis did some imaginary garden designs, Bud did Star Wars characters, and I did our garden statue of a cat;
• made broccoli and cheese quiche and Dutch babies with our CSA-box eggs;
• went for a post-dinner walk in the cool breezy air;
• decided last-minute to go to the town concert on the green, which was inexplicably not happening despite flags and a sign announcing it . . . .
• so we went for consolation ice cream, which we ate in the front yard while watching the sunset, surprisingly undisturbed by mosquitoes, until Mama got home late!

What a wonderful summer day!!

And thanks to Heather and the camp community for helping me tap summer's potential.  Even though camp ends soon, I know its effects will last til school starts . . . and beyond.

What Does the Doctor Say?

Sis made up a new song this evening, "What Does the Doctor Say?" (You know the Ylis tune so sing along!):


"What does the Doctor say?
I'm not, not, not, not from Mars . . . .

"What does Donna say?
Oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi!

"What does Rose say?
Bad Wolf, Bad Wolf, Bad Wolf, Bad Wolf.

"What does the War Doctor say?
No, no, no, no, no more!

"What does River say?
Spoilers! Spoilers! Spoilers! Spoilers!

 " . . . . The secret of his name
Ancient mystery,
buried in Gallifrey
Will I ever know?
What is his name?"

--Sis Hungry (I'm very proud and impressed)

No-School Dance

That's right, no school tomorrow because of snow.

We danced in celebration--to "Vogue" and "Fame" and "You Can't Stop the Beat" (Hairspray.)  And stayed up late playing Blink (Mama and Sis) and building mini-Lego buildings (Bud) and reading about the kitchens at Hampton Court (me, squealing "We'll be there in three months!")

And now, later than planned, the kiddos are off to bed, as the snow begins to blow and pile up outside.

(Gommie and Pop called to say they just got home and were glad to escape the weather.)

Pop!

Mama has always wondered why I equate eating popcorn with snow.  And I've never had a good answer for her.  I just know that, when snow falls, I often think of making popcorn and hot chocolate for our snack.

And then riding in the car listening to the radio on Sunday, I heard these lyrics from, "Let it Snow":

It doesn't show signs of stoppingAnd I've bought some corn for poppingThe lights are turned way down lowLet It Snow! Let It Snow! Let It Snow!

Now, we know where I got the idea.

I guess lyrics in songs have more power than I thought!

Sing a Song

I've noticed something recently.  I sing a lot, making up lyrics to songs to fit the moment (this morning it was "Of all the Cats I've Loved Before" and something else to the tune of "Feelings") or singing snippets of lyrics that come to me ("Crazy" comes to mind a lot, but I also taught the kids my favorite elementary music class song "Don Gato" this morning and referred to "Super Turkey" at dinner), in addition to singing along to the radio or iPod.  Sometimes, they aren't even songs I really know.  But I've heard them all of my life.  Because Gommie does it, too.  In fact, many of the bits I sing are the ones she sang, like "Oh, I ain't got a barrel of money . . ." or "Roll out the barrel" or "First you say you do, and then you don't . . . " or "Sidewalks of New York" or "You are my sunshine" or so many others that don't come to mind right now because it's not really a conscious habit.  I'm singing before I know it.  Yesterday afternoon, I was singing along to the carols at the craft store before I even realized they'd started the Christmas music!  I wonder if Sis and Bud will do the same thing?

-=-=-=-=-
"Don Gato"

Oh Senor Don Gato was a cat
On a high red roof Don Gato sat
He went there to read a letter,
Meow, meow, meow
Where the reading light was better,
Meow, meow, meow
'Twas a love note for Don Gato

I adore you wrote the lady cat
Who was fluffy, white and nice and fat
There was not a sweeter kitty,
Meow, meow, meow
In the country or the city,
Meow, meow, meow
And she said she'd wed Don Gato

Oh, Don Gato jumped so happily
He fell off the roof and broke his knee
Broke his ribs and all his whiskers,
Meow, meow, meow
And his little solar plexus,
Meow, meow, meow
Ay Caramba cried Don Gato

Then the doctors all came on the run
Just to see if something could be done
And they held a consultation,
Meow, meow, meow
About how to save their patient,
Meow, meow, meow
How to save Senor Don Gato

But in spite of everything they tried
Poor Senor Don Gato up and died
And it wasn't very merry,
Meow, meow, meow
Going to the cemetery,
Meow, meow, meow
For the ending of Don Gato

When the funeral passed the market square
Such a smell of fish was in the air
Though his burial was slated,
Meow, meow, meow
He became reanimated,
Meow, meow, meow
He came back to life, Don Gato