Nostalgia

I put them on the bus for the last day of elementary school.  And I've been looking over my old photos, and everyone else's who posted on FB, and am feeling the bittersweet pang of children growing.

No more bus stops for me (they won't want me at the middle school stop, even if it's our corner.)
No more dress code/uniforms for them.
No more field days, Snowflake Bingo, Pajama Nights, school musical, Math nights, recess, and all of the other great elementary school events I can't think of right now.
No more elementary-school family, after seven years, because our school splits into two middle schools.
No more mom network for me; most of the moms I know are off to the other middle school.

Sure, there are lots of great things coming, but I'm looking back right now and appreciating the community of which we've been a part since 2010.  It's been a wonderful journey for all of us (with some not so great bits) and I'm going to miss the comfort and familiarity, the support and dedication that is elementary school.  It's never quite the same afterwards and they won't ever be at another school this long (well, unless they do a Ph.D. and take a bit, but that's not the same either.)

So, goodbye, elementary school, and thank you.

Proud Parents and Grandparents

I am all aglow from the events of the last week.

And not just because of the heat wave which engulfs us and is sending the kids home early today (the temperature in the classrooms is up over 100F, definitely no learning going on.)

No, I'm a very proud mom after a weekend of the school play, a horse show, and the sixth-grade award ceremony.

"It's Showtime!"
And best yet, all the grandparents and their uncle Goo were here to celebrate all of these with us.

The play, oh the play.  The kids--all the kids--were marvelous in Madagascar Jr., a musical retelling of the popular animated movie.  Bud played "Rico," the kung-fu fighting, sushi-loving penguin.  I loved watching him perform, from his slides onto the middle of the stage, his quick kung-fu moves, to his singing "Sea Shanty."  I really liked how he waddled and moved his head around like a real penguin. For me, he just lit up the stage.

Sis was a police officer, appearing mostly in the first few scenes and then the end, looking intimidating in her navy blue (real) police officer shirt and hat.  She does stern well and was believable with that walkie-talkie.  But oh, we had a shock to see her in eyeliner and blush.  She became a teenager right in front of us.  Kinda surprising.  But it all totally worked in the part.  And she didn't have to dance (which she does not like to do on stage.)

I was the snack coordinator again, meaning I oversaw the procurement and distribution of water and snacks to the cast during all three shows.  It's a bit of organizational work, but not much compared to people in charge of costumes, props, choreography, etc.  And we get to go backstage, which other parents not working do not.  I saw the show twice, checking the cafeteria before and after, and during intermission, and then worked the cafeteria snacks on Saturday.  It was pretty hot the last two performances, but we had enough water and watermelon, which is their favorite.  Mama, Gommie, and Pop also helped us out--fetching coolers and ice, helping bring in snacks.

After the show on Friday, we all headed to a local diner with much of the cast, loudly celebrating while wolfing down dinner.  Everyone was exhilarated and exhausted.  Saturday night, it was me, Mama, Gommie and our Beloved Babysitter and her boyfriend.  So special that they came!  She brought the kiddos flowers and then we all went to a diner together afterwards.  We love to see her and were interested to finally meet her chef boyfriend.

After Sunday's show, there was a cast party after the last performance.  The kids signed each other's t-shirts and posters between a chicken dinner and cake.  They also got the cast cards that audience members could leave for them.  We all wrote cards for Sis and Bud, and I also wrote cards to all my Girl Scouts and a few of the other cast members.  I just wanted them to know how much I really enjoyed the show and all their hard work.  It was a nice little party, after an amazing weekend.  And I couldn't be prouder.

Ride 'em, Horse Girl
In the midst of all that, Sis had a horse show on Saturday which we did not want to miss.  Even tired, she loves to ride "her" horse, Murphy.  So, Gommie, Pop, Mama, and I spent a hot day in the field watching those beautiful beasts and their composed riders.  Sis got a first place for jumping (because she made her diagonals correctly) and three third places for Walk-Trot-Canter equitation and pleasure (her dear Murphy was being a bit stubborn.)  I can't really tell what makes for a good ride; I just like watching.  Gommie was especially interested in how the whole horse show worked--the different events, the different commands ("the class is closed," "riders reverse at the wall," posting vs. half-seat, pleasure vs equitation--I understand it all, just barely.)  But we were all a bit relieved to get out of the heat after her events were over.  Still, I love watching her ride.  Almost as much as she loves horses!

Though, the kids did manage to go swimming with Gommie and Pop after eating some SmashBurgers!  And then it was off to the next performance . . . .  

And the Award Goes to  . . . .
It was a very hot night in the school auditorium, where I had been since Thursday (for the final dress rehearsal, I chaperoned with Gommie), but we were all happy to gather in our hot-weather finest for the celebration of the kids leaving elementary school.  I guess you could call it graduation or commencement, but they don't.  Sis wore her dress pants and white gauzy shirt, Bud was in a light blue Oxford--basic dress up clothes for them both (like for chorus or orchestra.)  We took a lot of pictures, in many combinations, getting a few great ones with grandparents and many of their school friends.  We didn't quite know what to expect from the ceremony, didn't really know what awards there were.  It started with a basic presentation of certificates for their involvement in the play, chorus, art, orchestra, etc., all of which were just passed out in an envelope.  We did know about the Presidential Awards, which the kids hoped to earn--the Gold award was for a 3.5 GPA and over 60 on various STAR tests.  I thought they qualified, but we didn't know until they were both called--the second set of twins to earn the Presidential Gold Award that night (the other set, in their class, also has two moms!)   They just beamed with pride and I was sniffly.  (I laughed that we should switch their last names so they could be called earlier in the round up!)  Then the Character Education Awards.  Someone had told Sis they thought she should get one--and she did!  Wow!  And then Bud won a prestigious Citizenship Award named after a local detective, that came with $100 (all the kids oohed and aahed)!  (He got it with another young lady, one of our friends and a former Girl Scout.)  Wow again!  So proud of them--academics and character!!!  Proud of all of our kids, especially their gifted-and-talented classmates and my Girl Scouts (current and former.)  It really was fun to celebrate them.  Which we did with more cake in the cafeteria, more pictures all over, and then a trip to the local ice cream shop with a bunch of their classmates.  I got a hot fudge sundae because I was proud of Mama and me, too.  Ma had even said we were good parents, which was a wonderful first.  My folks say it a lot, but it means so much each time; I was really glad that my dad made the trip, which was a last-minute decision.   And I'm glad they were all able to be with us, surrounding the kiddos with love and support during this exciting time.

And so now, they'll be home early because of the heat.  Gommie and Pop are off to who-knows-where, but we'll see them later.  The kids are essentially done with class--tomorrow is their 6th-grade picnic and then they have two half-days (hope the heat dismissal doesn't change that.)  Then they really are done!  Middle Schoolers!

It's all bittersweet.  I love their teachers and the supportive environment of the school.  They've had good times here and grown and learned so much.  I have, too.  But just as we moved from home to preschool, preschool to half-day kindergarten, half-day to full day, the small elementary school to the upper grades at the larger elementary school, we'll all be okay moving to middle school.  And I think, after a bit, we'll all be good, thanks to the love and support of family and community.

Again

Looks like I'm behind again!

With the kids asking me not to post much if anything about them here and the rise in my use of FB, I just don't post as much as I used to, though I know that several friends and family members read this first.  So I'll try to do better.

Let's see.  Today, Bud is home with a cold.  I think it's his first sick day in a year or so.  In fact, if the rest of the week weren't so big--school field trip, chorus concert, piano recital--I would have sent him to school.  But as it was, I didn't want to risk his getting worse.

Now I'm just hoping Sis doesn't get it, because she also has the field trip and concert plus a giant two-night Girl Scout "glamping" weekend at a resort.  Wish us all luck.  The weather has been damp and warm, the trees and such have exploded, and everyone seems to be sniffling.

So, what have I been doing?

Well, I went up against the BOE and school administration with other parents in town and defeated an initiative to unlevel middle school, meaning cancel honors classes.  I've composed a long post about this in my head several times because I'm still quite conflicted.  See, there's a huge achievement gap in our town, meaning African-Americans and Latinos score very much lower than their white and Asian counterparts; they are also less represented in said honors classes.  I recognize this as a social justice issue and know that such scores likely indicate albeit unintentional systemic/institutional bias and even racism.  The Democrat, social liberal, and Unitarian Universalist in me wants to rectify this.  But then there's the mom in me that fears that my children's academic achievement would be stalled by a non-leveled class, especially because they've been in the special gifted and talented class for three years (and are still not very challenged academically--how would they fare in an unleveled class??!!)  Certainly unleveling can succeed if properly prepared for, but the district was trying to rush the measure through without invovling parents (without even really telling them) and with little preparation for the changes.  Their instructional plan for high achievers in "regular" classes?  "Raise expectations, provide support, provide understanding."  BS.  That's not a plan.  They also mentioned an honors option, which is really just more homework and projects AT HOME--meaning they don't get instructional time with the teachers and the bulk of their education is independent learning (tough for 7th graders!)  AND then there were mentions that the accelerated learners would help the typical kids.  Great.  Social nightmare for everyone and then my kids would still not be getting their instructional time with the teacher.  So, the parent in me rebelled, took to FB, organized letters and phone calls, and helped convince the BOE not to unlevel until there is a better plan.  We need a better plan and we need to help the students who are being failed by our district.  But I'm still very torn about defeating the unleveling, which is supported by the National Education Association (NEA) and other groups, though several studies say it doesn't change the outcomes for slower learners.  Probably because middle school is way too late to affect monumental change.  It needs to start in preschool!  So . . . . so.  So, we're not homeschooling or sending our kids to private school next year.  And if the district votes to unlevel with a better plan after next year, I will stay informed and involved and maybe even support the plan.  Or take a "gap year" for 8th with my kids and travel around!!

What else?  On Saturday, a friend and I went to a wonderful mandala workshop at Copper Beech Institute in West Hartford and had a lovely, creative, inspiring day.  We walked the labyrinth and had a picnic lunch before class and then made a freehand mandala and a literal gratitude mandala in class.  And I learned how to make colored Zen Gems!  So much fun!  I spent Sunday practicing my new-found skills.

Last week, Mama's office hosted a special "Take Your Child to Work" Day program and so the kids spent 13+ hours following along her usual day!  They were up at 5:30 a.m. and home a bit before 7 p.m.  They had a tour, a special talk on what the company does and how the US's financial system works (they even got money from all over the world.  Ours got Cambodia and the DRCongo), and then went with Mama to her meetings.  They also played Nerf battles with her co-workers, which was their favortie part.  I think they had new-found respect for Mama's long work day and challenging work life.  Sis said, "I'll never think waking up at 7 a.m. for school is early again!"

The next month or so wraps up the year's extracurriculars, for the most part, as well as their time at elementary school.  There will be several special events and middle school orientations.  Plus the school play.  But I'm anxious that it's all coming to an end.  I've really loved their elementary school, especially their teachers, and am nervous about the move to middle school, particularly because most of the kids of my informal moms' network are going to the other middle school.  Which means I sorta start from scratch, just like the kiddos (though, several of the kids in their special class will move on to honors at the middle school; I just don't know those parents as well.)  But we have the summer to get used to the transition.

And I won't even get into all the summer plans . . . .

Proud Mommy

The kiddos are in the school musical!  With speaking parts!  The show is Madagascar Jr.  And Bud is one of the penguins, Rico, who eats a lot and does martial arts.  Sound familiar?  Sis is Police Officer #1, which also makes some sense.  (She is a bus safety patrol, after all.)  We're excited for them and so proud that they auditioned--acapella in front of 4 adults in the big auditorium and then again at callbacks for Bud.  Not easy.  It'll be a lot of work from now til June, but they enjoy singing and being with their friends.  Besides, it's their last year at the school, their last musical.  Which makes it doubly special.  Here we go . . . .

-=-=-=-=-=-
On a side note:  Some kids who had larger parts before were very mad about the casting this year, going to the extent of stating that some who got parts don't have talent.  Talk about sour grapes.  A few are even threatening to quit already.  So we had to talk to Sis and Bud about attitude, good sportsmanship (so to speak), jealousy, and not to let it spoil their experiences.

Settling In

I can't believe it's been nearly two weeks since I posted last; that might be a record.

All is well.

Just busy.

School started and the kids are back in their routines.  Same teachers, same classmates.  That makes the transition into a new school year easier, if a little boring.  Next year, in middle school, will be exciting enough, though.

A few things have changed--the day of Girl Scouts, the timing of kung fu.  And Sis has radically changed her extracurriculars.  She has dropped piano, added horseback riding, and switched from figure skating to speedskating.  I'm so proud that she's trying something new, stretching herself, taking a risk.   I'm trying not to think of the real risks, as she suits up in helmet and kevlar neck protector!  But they take all the precautions, even have huge mats on the walls of the rink.  She was exhausted after the first session, which included more than an hour of conditioning--including hopping up the stairs and also doing crossovers up the stairs!!  But she hung in there and did it.  Then she spent about an hour learning the positions of speedskating and trying it out, all on special skates!  She really was pretty amazing!  A mom of a nationally-ranked skater said Sis would do well, that she was already taking to it quickly and she had strong legs.  She does like to go fast.

After she hobbled off the ice, we soaked her in Epsom salts and gave her some ibuprofen.  The next morning, she woke up bright eyed and bushy tailed, ready to go again.  She had horseback riding that evening, which also involves strong legs--with all the posting (essentially standing in the stirrups to keep weight off the horse).

For myself, I'm getting organized for our first GS meeting tomorrow and for historic house tours starting at the end of the month.  Hospice is ongoing; I'm with the same woman I visited in the spring and summer.

In addition to school and activities, the church year has also started.  It was nice to be back, after a bit of an absence in the spring when they canceled our early service.  Good to see friendly faces, important to reflect on September 11th.  I'm a lay minister, mostly in charge of meal coordination for people in need.  One of our summer recipients was up and about after extensive back surgery; she looked great! And I'm helping to teach a young member how to crochet.  I also signed up to be on the religious education steering committee. Meetings are before church, which is easier than weeknights.  There was also a book (re-)sale, at which we always find great items.  Mama got a book on the daughters of Genghis Khan.  I picked up The Hare with the Amber Eyes.  Sis picked up a few YA books.  And they chose for me a book on New England's stone walls.  I made an appreciative "ooooh" sound when they handed it to me, as Mama apparently predicted I would.  They all say I make that sound when I see an old stone wall (I love old stone walls.)  They say I make the same sound for raptors, butterflies, old houses--and a much gruntier sound for snakes!

Then we went for a delicious pancake and omelet breakfast, one of our favorite parts of going to church.

That's how the last two weeks have gone.  The temperatures have started to drop at night but are still warm for me during the day.  Our dogwood tree is already changing, though, most likely because of the moderate drought and stress of the extra heat.  I think we set a record on Saturday and will again tomorrow.  Ugh.  Bring me fall!

Class Engaged!

Today, I had the honor and pleasure to be invited to give a Zentangle lesson at a local elementary school by a friend and neighbor who teaches there.  She had taken my very first Zentangle class a few weeks ago and wanted to share it with her fifth graders.  This was the perfect time, as school is winding down and kids are getting antsy to be indoors.

And it went wonderfully well.


I gave them each a kit with tiles, a pen, pencil, and a special Zentangle bookmark.  And then I began drawing on my easel.

We started with the word "Zentangle"--a combination of Zen (which refers to Japanese meditation--I didn't mention Buddhism) and art, or a tangle of lines.  Zentangle drawing is an art in which you can elicit meditative feelings of calm and focus by creating repetitive patterns in beautiful works of art.

I started with some questions:
Have you ever felt angry, sad, scared, nervous, tired, bored, frustrated?  How did your body feel when you felt those emotions?  How is it different when you are happy or satisfied or excited?  I told them that meditation was a way to transcend some of those emotions, especially the negative ones, a way to rest and calm their bodies and minds--by using their breath!  Everyone breathes, you can do it anywhere, without any supplies, like when you're tired of waiting in line or scared to go into the doctor's office.  And so we tried a short breath meditation--in through your nose, out through your mouth.  Feel the change in temperature, the breath over your lips, the rise and fall of your chest.  A few of them giggled, some huffed and snorted and sighed, but they tried it for several moments.   I tried to stay away from cliches like "being grounded" and "center yourself."

And then we started.  They pulled out their kits, with the tiles, pen, pencil, and bookmark.   I worked through the steps at my post-it flip pad and easel (with big black marker and gray shading marker)--gratitude and appreciation, corner dots, border, string, tangle shade, initial and sign, and appreciate again--while they followed along on their tiles.  We did a pretty typical first tile--z-shaped tile with basic strings crescent moon, hollibaugh, florz, and printemps.  I told them about a lot of variations (which only make sense if you know Zentangle)--drawing squiggles or loops in their borders, putting dots between auras in crescent moon, shading the spaces behind the lines in hollibaugh, shading the lines of hollibaugh, putting dots in the spaces behind the lines of hollibaugh, drawing printemps or crescent moons in the spaces of hollibaugh, putting other shapes at the intersections of florz, making big and little spirals in printemps, connecting the lines of hollibaugh to the lines of florz, putting a few printemps in the spaces of hollibaugh or florz.  Several of the kids gave the variations a try.  It's a lot like the first tile I ever did in my own first Zentangle class last year on retreat.  While they drew, I kept a somewhat constant Zentangle narrative going, while I walked around the room:

• If they can write "iSCO," they can do most of the strokes in Zentangle patterns
• No eraser = no mistakes (but, just in case, I pretended to mess up and then showed them Bronx Cheer to cover it  up)
• What does a "hollibaugh" really look like?  Nobody knows!  There is no right or real in Zentangle.    The names are non-descriptive, just a way to give us a shorthand for talking about the art and to each other
• Shade as part of the design (not trying to create consistent internal light source)
• Look at tile at arm's length
• Turn it around to look at it from several angles--no right side up!
• Go your own pace
• Everyone is different so make it your own
• Go back to your breath meditation if you get frustrated
• Borders are made to be crossed
• Lines don't have to be straight 

While they finished up their first tile and placed it on my tablecloth for the class mosaic, I  showed them the Apprentice video chapter 6 of Rick Roberts and Maria Thomas talking about how they were inspired to create the steps of Zentangle.  I then explained that Maria and Rick didn't invent patterns (those are everywhere--in nature and human-made items), that they came up with the list of steps to access meditation through art.  We looked at the class mosaic and saw how the tiles were all different, all creative and all individual--with same instructions!  Then I distributed Apprentice letter to parents and announced that they were all Zentangle Apprentices.  Harkening back to the beginning, I asked them how they felt now.  "Good," they yelled.  I told them they could tap into this feeling, creativity, and beauty whenever they needed or wanted to.

      

I was there about an hour and they were so focused, curious, and excited.  I even gave them two extra tangles (zander and pokeroot) because they wanted to learn more, even though I had to rush them.  I pointed to the tangled border of their Apprentice letter to parents and said there were so many patterns--they could even make up some!  (If they'd name them after me.)

I was surprised with how hesitant they already were at 10 - 11 years old to make a mistake; most of them admitted being very hesitant when looking at a blank piece of paper and asked to create something.  But once we got the dots, borders, and strings on the tiles, they settled in.  Still, at each step, they wanted reassurance that they weren't "wrong" and that their designs were "good."  Both the teacher and I kept reiterating that there were no mistakes, that they made the creative choices, that different was okay.  Even still, at the end, a couple of students wouldn't join their tiles to the mosaic. 

But they begged the teacher to do more Zentangle patterns.  I left the Apprentice DVD with the teacher and two extra tiles for each kid (plus some extra pens in case some broke.)  I told them they could look up Zentangle online and find all kinds of patterns, that they could make greeting cards or pencil cases or whatever they wanted.  The teacher said it was the most focused her class had ever been all year.

Maybe next year, we should offer the lesson in the beginning of the year, and then the teacher can introduce new tangles as they go and the students can add them to projects at Valentine's Day or Mother's Day; they can tangle when they are anxious about a test or done with their work.  I know I would have loved it when I was a student, just like these kids did.  Just like I love it now.

The Show Went On

I can't even put the wonderful experience of the weekend into words.  The kids' elementary school musical was phenomenal!

Well, for an elementary school production.  But I'm a proud mommy and I thought it was marvelous.

Way back in January, they had been nervous about auditioning for the show, even though everyone gets a part.  Still, standing up and singing in front of people is very intimidating.  But they did it and both got into the ensemble.  Bud had a callback and had hoped for a small speaking part.  Instead, he became one of the dancers.

For months they practiced every week.  Hours.  The last week, they rehearsed until 8 pm on Tuesday, 6 pm on Wednesday, and 9:15 on Thursday.  And behind the scenes, many parents were busy.  I stepped in to coordinate the healthy snacks for the performers during the show (the last person left no notes and, of course, I wasn't involved last year so it was a steep learning curve all the way through the weekend.)  Mama served as a backstage runner/stage door manager so someone else could see the show on Saturday.  I bought make up, found the right shoes, filled out forms to buy t-shirts and DVDs, and designed our congratulatory ads for the program.  We did a lot of driving back and forth.  Other parents spent everyday at the rehearsals and nights making sets and costumes and props.  So much hard work by so many dedicated and enthusiastic people.

We were all atwitter on Friday for the hour or so between their arriving home on the bus and their needing to be back at school.  It was a long wait for all of us.  Finally we got the kids freshly showered and deodorized (imagine 80+ sweaty kids without deodorant under hot lights with no air conditioning in rooms together.)  I got the snacks and paper goods into the car.  Off we went.

After getting them where they need to be and setting up the snacks in the cafeteria, Mama and I took our seats for the first show.  So excited for them, so nervous for them.

And they both shined!  Lit up the stage!  What can I say?  I only watched them.  Sis was in a flowery dress with a pink bow on her head.  Being shorter than almost everyone else, she looked about five years old.  Sweet and cute.  She doesn't like dresses, being "sweet" or "cute, though she likes pink but not bows.  We told her she was a great actress to pull off the role!  Bud started in a dark suit with a cap, then removed the jacket to show his suspenders and hiked his pants like knickers (with this handy little elastic thing.)  Later, he'd put on a band uniform.  And he danced and danced with great expression and joy.  Of course, I got all teary.

We saw them perform twice--Friday and Sunday--and spent Saturday helping backstage.  The kids got into costume, then went into hair and make up, and then waited in the cafeteria for their various cues.  They ate fresh fruit and veggies, had lots of water, and talked relatively quietly with their friends.  Sis played UNO and read.  Bud ate lots of fruit.

After each show, we went out, mainly to a late supper at a local place.  Just like real Broadway stars!  They told stories with their friends, wolfed down fries and shakes, sang songs together, gave one another back rubs, and signed each other's special shirts.  The adults sat, ate, and marveled at the kids' energy.  Bud especially talked and talked about the whole thing; I wish I could remember everything he enthused about.  (If I do, I'll insert it here.)

And then it ended much more suddenly than it all began.  Three days, three performance, the end of the show and the weekend.  But we all made a lifetime of great memories and, I think, awakened a little bit of the performing bug in each of them.

I'm glad they have one more year in elementary school so they can do it all again.