A Weekend Away

I had another lovely Zentangle retreat at Copper Beech Mindfulness Institute, my fifth!  I love the location--a huge, connected, multi-building monastery on a forested hill complete with labyrinth and (at least once that I saw, though not this year) Great Horned Owls.  This time, my little room overlooked the woods, my favorite view there. 

I was getting into the retreat spirit early, stopping at the other labyrinth in town--can you imagine, two lovely labyrinths?--which I had never walked.  I do love to walk a labyrinth--it's restorative and contemplative.  And it's the first thing I did when I got to the monastery, walking the labyrinth there, which is my favorite of anywhere.  I love the wide, flat, accessible walkway, and most particularly the beautiful stone circle in the middle.  In fact, I actually bought a print from the Monastery Gallery of a photo of the labyrinth, stretched to make it look painterly.  Lovely.

The majority of the weekend was devoted to Zentangle. I love to learn new Zentangle technqiues, to be challenged in my practice, and to draw with a group.  And I got to do all that this weekend.  Several of the projects were outside my comfort zone--I generally like black-and-white, non-representational tangles.  This weekend we used a lot of watercolor to make little houses and a "creative girl" (inspired by Danielle Donaldson), which would not have been my own choice, but I had such a great time tangling.  And I've gotten more comfortable with color as non-representational, meaning I'm not specifically coloring in particular shapes, but only laying down washes of color before or after drawing. 

The two women at my table were new to Zentangle and asked a lot of questions; so I got to explain and explore Zentangle with them--comfort tangles (the ones you know and use a lot), favorite resources (www.tanglepatterns.com and the books Zentangle Primer and  A Tangle a Day), tips to turn the tiles while drawing, step outs of Huggins and w-2 and pokeleaf/root and Diva Dance Rock 'n Roll, all of which only mean anything to people who tangle. There were tons of supplies, raffle prizes for many (I gave away my blank canvas tote and origami book to one of the newbies at my table who didn't win.) 

We enjoyed several fantastic meals--roasted chicken, lemon fish, roasted potatoes, the best balsamic vinaigrette, orange-y pickled beets, oatmeal with all the toppings (granola, raisins, Marcona almonds, blackberries, cinnamon, yum!), frosted lemon poppyseed cake, a variety of cookies, and delicious little cannoli--it's such a treat to be cared for this way.  It was a lovely little break.

While I was away, Sis worked her last Girl Scout cookie booth for the year and for her term as a Girl Scout (she wants to be an independent Juliette next year, without a troop, so I had my last cookie booth last weekend!)  She also got to walk her horse outside on a sunny day because the ground had firmed up a bit.  (I got to go outside with the horse and Sis yesterday; Patience was so happy that she actually rolled on the ground.  I missed it, though, because I was corralling the dogs who had spooked her just a few minutes before.)  And Bud had his first competition of the year, winning three gold medals and a high score of 9.93 in straight sword.  Yay! 

Fragment dice to choose a tangle!

It Takes Patience

Allow me to introduce our horse, Patience.  She's an approximately 8-year-old quarter horse mare, with some debate about whether she is a Paint (Sabino, specifically, with white splashes on her belly) or a chestnut. 



She's exactly 14.2 hands high, which makes her a big pony or a small horse.  She has two really distinctive marks:  a horse-head brand on her thigh and a unicorn-shaped white splash on her belly (I can't remember which sides, left or right, for either of these.)

She comes to us via Sis's old riding school from a horse farm in Vermont, where she lived outside on a mountain.  Now she's at a new barn, where she mainly lives outside in a paddock either by herself or with another mare.  She isn't so fond of male horses; she kicked one at the old barn who had bitten her (both were okay in the end.)  There is a "fan club" trio of male horses who watch her at the new barn, their heads swiveling in unison at the young mare; even the donkeys like watching her.  As Sis's old riding coach said, "You horse has a nice ass!" 

She is very patient in the aisle when she's being groomed and harnessed or unharnessed; we wonder if that's how she got her name.  She throws her head when the saddle goes on before a ride and yawns a few times when the bit comes out afterwards.  She has been feistier recently, perhaps because of the fan club, and even tossed Sis off for the first time on Saturday when she was startled by the truck of a neighbor of the farm.

Sis loves her completely (her yawns, her fluff, her scent, her soft nose, her wiggly lips, etc etc etc) and especially loves taking pictures of her derpy (silly or dopey) side.  And Mama and I are becoming horse lovers, too.  Mama is even thinking of riding.

How could we not love that face?

Our Gommie and Pop Visit

My parents have headed home after being in the northeast for about a month.  They visited upstate NY with a stop at Niagara Falls (too many tourists!) and time in the Adirondacks (beautiful color) and later northern Maine, including Acadia, and Vermont; no moose though. They were with us two for two long weekends, which we packed full of activities.

(And on the weekends that Gommie and Pop were away, we went to see the Faerie Villages, which were lovely and whimsical as always.)

I already told you about Applepalooza, our annual fall party with lots of tasty treats.  It was great to introduce my parents to all my friends and vice versa; I like to show them all off!   We also saw many of the kids' friends at their induction into the National Junior Honor Society.  The ceremony was short and sweet--our favorite--and it was fun to watch the teens bustle around taking photos, eating, and laughing afterwards.  I'm glad my parents could share in our pride at their academic accomplishments. 

Otherwise, they bounced back and forth between horses and kung fu.  Regular lessons and big events.  There was a big kung fu performance over the weekend.  Bud performed numerous forms, including Tong Bei (a hand form), spear, nine chain, three-staff, group broadsword, and group straight sword.  Twice.  Gommie and Pop enjoyed watching his skill and stamina.  And that evening, we all went out for a celebratory meal at The Place, an outdoor grilled shellfish place.  I picked up extra salads (potato, cole slaw, and a prosciutto pasta salad), some bread, and cookies to go along with the grilled corn, veggie kebabs, clams, mussels, steamers, and chicken we ordered.  A lovely evening together outside.

Gommie made several trips to the barn with Sis, getting to know Patience and the routine.  And Gommie even rode Patience!  She said she hadn't been on a horse since the 1950s.  It was wonderful and very impressive; she looked good. I love how my mom is always up to try anything and is so curious about the world around her.

Sis had her first away schooling show at a farm in central Connecticut, on what turned out to be a very cold day with huge wind gusts and chill below freezing.  It would have been okay, except we didn't quite prepare well enough (I didn't realize it was going to be so windy)--Sis was just in her show coat and shirt, not even winterized!  The day started for Sis at 4 am as she got up to head to the farm to prep her horse.  There were braids to loop, coats to brush, shipping wraps to affix, and all manner of blankets and gear to take (that horse has more blankets than I do--and I crochet them!)  We had a lot to learn and were a step behind (more Mama and me than Sis, who knows what she's doing) and tensions were high.  Not enough sleep or caffeine!  We caravanned to the site, at one point with 7 cars stuck behind the trailer and our 5 cars.  Once the horses were out and warming up, everyone settled.  And we realized the cold wind was only beginning to blow harder.  We braved the weather and saw Sis earn a ribbon in each of her events!  We are so proud of her.  And the horse!  Especially for her ribbon in jumping because this was the highest Sis has ever jumped--2 feet!  I didn't know she could do that.  But together, they did.  When the competition was over, Sis and Mama had to settle the horse at the home barn while Bud, the grandparents, and I took some down time.  And then we celebrated at hibachi.

We managed to do a few other things.  My parents were educated about BTS, watching a documentary on the K-pop phenomenon and seeing several BTS videos.  Bud danced for them and even Pop wiggled a bit!  (We also found a dance class for Bud, cemented by the fact that they were learning a routine to a BTS song while we were there!)  We had a couple of Mario Kart tournaments--it's Pop's favorite computer game.  He's getting better and even routinely placed in single digits.  And I scored my very first First Place, running Cheep Cheep Beach.  It's fun to play together.  And we laugh a lot.  We also took the kids out of school for a day and went for a hike at a local park, one of my favorites.  Except I managed to get us lost!  I made a wrong turn, adding an extra mile to our excursion.  So, not lost-lost, just more than we expected.  Even though the trees were still green, it was a delightful outing.

Pop found the gate post!  We've been to this park several times and have always
looked for the old cedar post mentioned in the didactic label.  Pop found it
a-ways off.

And of course we ate.  We always make time to eat.  Bud made his famous lasagna.  Mama made her delicious garlic chicken.  And we had apple cider doughnuts, Greek food at the diner, Peruvian food, Mexican food, pizza, ice cream, seafood, hibachi, to name a few.

Now it's quiet, less busy.  We probably all need to rest after the vacation!

Changes

The beginning of school was long my new year beginning, not January.  When I was not in school, I still always liked the beginning of fall and feeling rejuvenated by the change in temperatures.  We're back to the new year being in September, with kids in the house.  And this year has seen many changes.

First, neither Bud nor I am taking piano anymore; he, because he lost interest, and me, because I couldn't justify the expense anymore.

Sis has also dropped speedskating.  Her foot is still a bit tender from when a 1000 lb horse stepped on it!  And I think she realized that she didn't like competing, which was the main point.

Mama has started playing the ukelele, a present from me on our 21st anniversary.  She's been strumming along to "I Lava You" from the Pixar short.  It's sweet--and she's gotten good fast.  She's dabbled at playing piano, guitar, and violin over the years, but this one has stuck.

And . . . and I've saved the biggest for last:  we bought a horse!  It's a convoluted story.  There was conflict and disruption at the barn, as the current owner was trying to retire and sell the place and it fell through with much acrimony.  As part of the proceedings, the prospective buyer bought several horses, including Sis's favorite horse, Patience.  And then, as the deal fell through, the new owner of the horses was going to take away Patience.  With all the chaos, and with the sadness of Murphy's departure so fresh, we bought the horse.  We worried that it sends the wrong message--that you can buy your way out of pain.  But we think it will be outweighed by all the hard work, discipline, sacrifice, persistence, etc.  Hopefully. 

We are boarding the horse--Patience, an 8-year-old chestnut mare (Quarterhorse, apparently), who is so named because she stands very still and patient in the aisle while being groomed and bridled--at the farm where Sis has been riding these last years.  They will care for the horse Monday through Saturday, with three meals a day, one blanket change, turn out, stall cleaning.  And on Sundays, we will do most of that.  But horses have to be ridden, so Sis will be there several days a week to ride her.  One of Sis's friends at the barn will be leasing her (and paying us) and so will ride her as well; she comes from a horsey family and will also help us.  Because Mama and I know nothing.  Sis knows a lot, but owning is different than leasing and it's a large learning curve.  We all went to visit Patience on Sunday and there was some concern that she might be a tad constipated--which can be very fatal in horses, quickly--but soon enough she wasn't.  I've never been so happy to see a pile of poo in my life!! 

Otherwise, Sis taught us all how to brush her--with three different brushes (curry brush, hard brush, and finishing brush)--and then took her for a walk.  Sis also washed her, tended her hooves, and picked the stall.  She's a very gentle, beautiful horse.  The farm owner said it would be the easiest horse purchase we'd ever make!  (Oh, goodness--the implications in that sentence!!)  Bud was a little apprehensive--horses are huge, even if Patience is barely a horse side-wise just a bit of a hand over a pony--but he'll settle in.  And Mama loves Patience.  She was talking to her and has been researching horses.  She'll even ride.  I'm not sure I will, but I like being around Patience nonetheless.

So that was this week's up-side.  The down-side was that I went to the ER on Monday night with severe abdominal pain yet again.  This time they didn't expect GI issues, but gynecological.  Perhaps a cyst or endometriosis.  It hurt like hell--almost like a partial obstruction--but no evidence of such; the ultrasounds didn't turn up anything.  I have a colonoscopy this week.  I think it's scar tissue from the four abdominal surgeries I've had; I can feel the baseball-sized tissue behind my belly button, but it isn't anything but scarring they've all told me (which if we remove would just, Catch-22, make more, apparently.)  We'll see.  I feel much better now, relieved it wasn't anything else.  But I would like more answers. 

All in all, it's a new beginning all around here.  I love fall.

The Weekend

We're watching the Super Bowl, though we have misgivings about the NFL.  And about the Patriots, even if they are widely loved up here.  The kids wanted to understand football and what all the other kids are excited about, so it's on and we're sorta watching.  I've explained the mechanics of the game. And we're evaluating the ads.  Liked Toyota's ad on the Paralympics. And Chris Hemsworth promoting Australia.  Not impressed with Dodge Ram using MLK's words to sell trucks, a focus on "service" or not.  The meanness of the Cure ads were funny, just barely.  And we're ready to see Solo. We liked Justin Timberlake at the half, though we didn't know most of his songs.  Bud liked his dancing, which is like the moves of the K-Pop band BTS that he likes so much.  We liked the tribute to Prince and the Trolls song.

Otherwise, it's been a busy weekend.  Mama worked from home Friday and we were able to have lunch together at a local Indian buffet.  As we were driving to the restaurant, I spotted a lump on a branch in a tree by the river.  An adult bald eagle!  Mama turned around and we were able to cross the road to see the beautiful bird, still at a safe distance from us.  I even got a few pictures.  You could see its head moving back and forth, presumably as it scanned for lunch, because several minutes later, it took off.  Gorgeous.  In fact, now we've seen eagles in pretty much the same area three days in a row--one on Friday (twice--before and after lunch!), two on one branch--one adult (with the telltale white head and dark body) and one juvie (splotchy brown but still really big) on Saturday, and then one adult today.

And of course we're rooting for the Eagles!  Friends think it's a sign that there are Eagles in New England territory!

Friday night, the kids had a birthday party dance to attend--one of the first kids to turn 13 in their group.  Mama enjoyed our second "date" of the day by eating pizza and watching Wings of the Dove, featuring lovely Venice.  Saturday had Sis helping with pony rides and Bud performing in a kung fu show for Lunar New Year.  Today we were similarly split, with Bud off for another performance.  Sis was supposed to go to speedskating, but her tummy was upset so she stayed home.

Ponies and horses are a bittersweet topic around our house these days.  We learned a week or so ago that the farm where Sis rides is going to send her beloved leased pony Murphy back to his owners in Vermont because he's too old to be ridden often and is having some leg troubles.  Sis is heartbroken.  We are heartbroken.  He was her first pony, pretty much, and can't ever be replaced in her heart.  And so she wants to see him as much as possible but knows that time is limited.  He'll probably leave in March.  Her coach has invited Sis to go to Vermont to help choose the next horse to come back to Connecticut.  And while she's sure she still wants to lease and loves horses, she's just so sad when she thinks of them right now.  It's going to be a tough month.

Okay, confession:  this is going to be long because I already wrote it as one of my papers for my CPE.

I had a wonderful experience in the religious education (RE) class I co-teach.  As I think I've explained, this year the focus is on the “Neighboring Faiths” curriculum, which requires participants to learn about various religions in our area, speak with their practitioners, and, when possible, attend a service.  Thus far, the class—with our kiddos included—has visited a rabbi from a conservative Jewish synagogue, a Roman Catholic mass, and a Presbyterian service.   This class is particularly important for Unitarian Universalists (UU) because we value the voices of prophetic men and women from many faiths.  We also recognize that we live in a global community and believe that multicultural competence, including interfaith dialogue, is an important part of being a citizen of the world. 

We have been preparing to visit a mosque and so met last week with a Muslim woman (NOTE:  Islam is the religion; Muslim is the practitioner) who travels the area teaching “Islam 101.”  She gave a wonderful presentation to our students, explaining core beliefs, the Five Pillars (belief, prayer, fasting, charity, pilgrimage), the reasons behind and techniques for the wearing of hijab, the timing and format of five prayers a day, the gestures and verses that comprise those prayers, and more.  She taught the children how to sing a song about the months of the Islamic calendar, recited many of the 99 names of Allah, and shared with us some sweet bean pie, a traditional African-American Muslim dish.  She spoke of her love of scarves and different editions of the Quran.  She even showed us her special app that alerts her to the time for prayers each day and also orients her towards Mecca for those prayers.  The kids were fascinated by the niqab she passed around so that we could look through the sheer material that would cover a woman's face and intrigued by the bowing and kneeling and rituals of her prayers.  As she had hoped, she made Muslims seem just like everyone else—not weird or scary or dangerous.  And she thanked us for inviting us because she believes it will help our world if we all understand and respect each other. 

On Sunday, we visited a local mosque and met their Imam, youth director, and young members of their community.  We were welcomed heartily into the mosque, removed our shoes as a sign of respect, and then sat in chairs in the main room.  The Imam talked to our group about the basis of Islam, focusing on the Six Pillars of Belief (as opposed to the practices of the pious that we learned about the week before):  1.) God (the Oneness of God, as opposed to the Trinity) 2.) Angels (“The Unseen,” like Gabriel 3.) Sacred Books (The Quran, but also the Torah, Psalms, and Gospels--aka Bible) 4.) Prophets (The Quran names 25, including Abraham, Noah, Moses, John the Baptist, Jesus, Mohammed is the last.  Jesus is not meant to be worshipped, only a messenger) 5.) Judgment Day (there are three lives—spiritual life before birth, terrestrial life, and then resurrected life after Judgment) 6.) Free will (God knows everything, but we choose.)  The students in our class were overwhelmed by all the teachings—especially when one of the adults tried to ask about jihad and Sunnis and Shi’ites. The Imam was very careful and clear in his disavowal of violence and hatred between faiths and races.  But he was talking to such a young group that many of them didn’t understand his words in quite the same vein as the adults.  Soon we shared doughnuts and the kids from both youth groups were smiling!   The Imam also based out thematic translations of the Quran in English to each student and adult present.  (We were all surprised to hear the telling of Jesus’s birth, when he spoke out as an infant, which appears in the Quranic book of Mary.)

We also witnessed the afternoon prayer, starting with the Athan called by the youth director.  I remembered my college summer in Tunisia when I was on an archaeological dig in Carthage and we could hear the calls to prayer resonate across the city from its many minarets five times a day.  Then, with the Imam going first, the long row of men and a shorter row of young women further behind, bowed and knelt repeatedly to pray.  In all, it lasted about 15 minutes.  Though, the Imam didn’t point it out, I could see the door to the area for ritual cleansing that many of the men who had stopped by for the afternoon prayer entered.  Apparently, there is a separate room for women—for their privacy, the Imam said—but they do not have to pray in there but can pray in the large room.  Still, the rows in front are for men, to protect the modesty of the women, who are behind.  (We had noticed separate entrances for “Brothers” and “Sisters” but they did not insist on their use today and had us all come through the Brothers’ door.  Also, one of our female teachers went to shake hands with the youth director who politely declined touching her.)  We were told later that it is important to pray close together—even touching feet—because it consolidates the spirit of the prayer.  I wondered why the men were so close together (even the carpet, with its decoration demarcating separate but small spaces, like individual prayer rugs.)  At our UU church people would never sit that close to anyone but spread out as a form of politeness and personal space.

I'm really loving this RE class, especially when we're looking at religions I don't know as well, like Islam.  It was all really interesting and great for the kids, and for me in my work as a hospice chaplain.  Soon, we'll study Buddhism, visit a Hindu temple, meet with some Quakers, and go to an AME church.

Proud Parents and Grandparents

I am all aglow from the events of the last week.

And not just because of the heat wave which engulfs us and is sending the kids home early today (the temperature in the classrooms is up over 100F, definitely no learning going on.)

No, I'm a very proud mom after a weekend of the school play, a horse show, and the sixth-grade award ceremony.

"It's Showtime!"
And best yet, all the grandparents and their uncle Goo were here to celebrate all of these with us.

The play, oh the play.  The kids--all the kids--were marvelous in Madagascar Jr., a musical retelling of the popular animated movie.  Bud played "Rico," the kung-fu fighting, sushi-loving penguin.  I loved watching him perform, from his slides onto the middle of the stage, his quick kung-fu moves, to his singing "Sea Shanty."  I really liked how he waddled and moved his head around like a real penguin. For me, he just lit up the stage.

Sis was a police officer, appearing mostly in the first few scenes and then the end, looking intimidating in her navy blue (real) police officer shirt and hat.  She does stern well and was believable with that walkie-talkie.  But oh, we had a shock to see her in eyeliner and blush.  She became a teenager right in front of us.  Kinda surprising.  But it all totally worked in the part.  And she didn't have to dance (which she does not like to do on stage.)

I was the snack coordinator again, meaning I oversaw the procurement and distribution of water and snacks to the cast during all three shows.  It's a bit of organizational work, but not much compared to people in charge of costumes, props, choreography, etc.  And we get to go backstage, which other parents not working do not.  I saw the show twice, checking the cafeteria before and after, and during intermission, and then worked the cafeteria snacks on Saturday.  It was pretty hot the last two performances, but we had enough water and watermelon, which is their favorite.  Mama, Gommie, and Pop also helped us out--fetching coolers and ice, helping bring in snacks.

After the show on Friday, we all headed to a local diner with much of the cast, loudly celebrating while wolfing down dinner.  Everyone was exhilarated and exhausted.  Saturday night, it was me, Mama, Gommie and our Beloved Babysitter and her boyfriend.  So special that they came!  She brought the kiddos flowers and then we all went to a diner together afterwards.  We love to see her and were interested to finally meet her chef boyfriend.

After Sunday's show, there was a cast party after the last performance.  The kids signed each other's t-shirts and posters between a chicken dinner and cake.  They also got the cast cards that audience members could leave for them.  We all wrote cards for Sis and Bud, and I also wrote cards to all my Girl Scouts and a few of the other cast members.  I just wanted them to know how much I really enjoyed the show and all their hard work.  It was a nice little party, after an amazing weekend.  And I couldn't be prouder.

Ride 'em, Horse Girl
In the midst of all that, Sis had a horse show on Saturday which we did not want to miss.  Even tired, she loves to ride "her" horse, Murphy.  So, Gommie, Pop, Mama, and I spent a hot day in the field watching those beautiful beasts and their composed riders.  Sis got a first place for jumping (because she made her diagonals correctly) and three third places for Walk-Trot-Canter equitation and pleasure (her dear Murphy was being a bit stubborn.)  I can't really tell what makes for a good ride; I just like watching.  Gommie was especially interested in how the whole horse show worked--the different events, the different commands ("the class is closed," "riders reverse at the wall," posting vs. half-seat, pleasure vs equitation--I understand it all, just barely.)  But we were all a bit relieved to get out of the heat after her events were over.  Still, I love watching her ride.  Almost as much as she loves horses!

Though, the kids did manage to go swimming with Gommie and Pop after eating some SmashBurgers!  And then it was off to the next performance . . . .  

And the Award Goes to  . . . .
It was a very hot night in the school auditorium, where I had been since Thursday (for the final dress rehearsal, I chaperoned with Gommie), but we were all happy to gather in our hot-weather finest for the celebration of the kids leaving elementary school.  I guess you could call it graduation or commencement, but they don't.  Sis wore her dress pants and white gauzy shirt, Bud was in a light blue Oxford--basic dress up clothes for them both (like for chorus or orchestra.)  We took a lot of pictures, in many combinations, getting a few great ones with grandparents and many of their school friends.  We didn't quite know what to expect from the ceremony, didn't really know what awards there were.  It started with a basic presentation of certificates for their involvement in the play, chorus, art, orchestra, etc., all of which were just passed out in an envelope.  We did know about the Presidential Awards, which the kids hoped to earn--the Gold award was for a 3.5 GPA and over 60 on various STAR tests.  I thought they qualified, but we didn't know until they were both called--the second set of twins to earn the Presidential Gold Award that night (the other set, in their class, also has two moms!)   They just beamed with pride and I was sniffly.  (I laughed that we should switch their last names so they could be called earlier in the round up!)  Then the Character Education Awards.  Someone had told Sis they thought she should get one--and she did!  Wow!  And then Bud won a prestigious Citizenship Award named after a local detective, that came with $100 (all the kids oohed and aahed)!  (He got it with another young lady, one of our friends and a former Girl Scout.)  Wow again!  So proud of them--academics and character!!!  Proud of all of our kids, especially their gifted-and-talented classmates and my Girl Scouts (current and former.)  It really was fun to celebrate them.  Which we did with more cake in the cafeteria, more pictures all over, and then a trip to the local ice cream shop with a bunch of their classmates.  I got a hot fudge sundae because I was proud of Mama and me, too.  Ma had even said we were good parents, which was a wonderful first.  My folks say it a lot, but it means so much each time; I was really glad that my dad made the trip, which was a last-minute decision.   And I'm glad they were all able to be with us, surrounding the kiddos with love and support during this exciting time.

And so now, they'll be home early because of the heat.  Gommie and Pop are off to who-knows-where, but we'll see them later.  The kids are essentially done with class--tomorrow is their 6th-grade picnic and then they have two half-days (hope the heat dismissal doesn't change that.)  Then they really are done!  Middle Schoolers!

It's all bittersweet.  I love their teachers and the supportive environment of the school.  They've had good times here and grown and learned so much.  I have, too.  But just as we moved from home to preschool, preschool to half-day kindergarten, half-day to full day, the small elementary school to the upper grades at the larger elementary school, we'll all be okay moving to middle school.  And I think, after a bit, we'll all be good, thanks to the love and support of family and community.

Giddy Up!

My troop:  13
Moms:  8
Other Girl Scouts:  300
Horses:  114
Days of rain:  3
Memories:  innumerable

I survived our Girl Scout weekend at Rocking Horse Ranch (RHR)!  I had thought, prepared, and stressed about this weekend for more than a year.  There was the initial decision, all the paperwork, lots of money, and then worries about it all being successful.  I take being a leader seriously and feel very responsible for the girls in my troop.  Thankfully, most of the moms were there so I had lots of help keeping track of girls.  See, because they are almost 12 (some of them are already), we let them have a lot of freedom with only occasional checking in, as long as they had a buddy with them at all times. And it worked.  There was only one drama episode (that I know of) and one tiny injury (a scrape on a water slide.)  This is success, indeed.  Plus, they loved it.

I'm hard pressed to remember what happened when.  So, I'll summarize.

• Horses:  Of course, we were at the ranch to ride.  Each troop had two separate trail rides, on Saturday and Sunday each.  But first we had a stable tour, learning about feeding and riding regimens.  It's not easy to take care and keep track of 114 horses, including one that was 55 years old!  Sis had so much fun wandering the stables, sniffing her favorite horse smells.  She really was in her happy place all weekend.  And she rode five times!  Girls could ride standby if there was space on a trail ride, and so she and a few friends hopped on three extra times.  She rode Outlaw, Bravo, Brady, and then Lil' Red twice.  One of the wranglers was especially encouraging to her, liking her spirit.  See, the riding was "Western," which is a different saddle and a completely different way of steering the horse.  Sis has been riding "English"--and was wearing her usual riding gear, including her own helmet, boots, and stable jacket--but when the wrangler asked if she would be posting (a part of English riding), she said, "No, I'm riding Western!"  He was tickled.  And he thought she was doing really well for her first Western rides.  She rode intermediate everytime (she can't go from standstill to canter immediately and so couldn't ride advanced, though she tried.)  None of them cared that it rained during a few of the rides; the rides are only cancelled if there is thunder. All of the girls, and most of the moms (minus me and another couple), rode at least twice, even with the rain. A few of the girls even got to see the horses sent out to pasture at the end of the riding day.  They close the roads and parking lot and escort the untacked horses out in groups.  We lined the drive and petted the horses as they went by.  It really was a beautiful sight.  Sis loved it and would have loved to just live in the stables.  I enjoyed being out at the stables and even had a discussion with the blacksmith (Gommie, I could hear your voice in my conversation with him!), who gave me a few used horseshoes, which I gave to the girls who got up early for the Sunday ride.  Sis is going to hang hers up.  (Side note:  the only unpleasant bit all weekend--even including the drama bit with two of our girls--was a dishonest and unfair GS leader who tried to save 15 spaces for her troop in front of our girls at that early-morning standby.  I had pointed out to her that it was unfair, but she insisted and wouldn't give way.  I'm not great at confrontation and so recruited two of my other moms who were much more aggressive, even yelling.  The dishonest woman changed her story several times--first her troop was just waking up and getting changed, then they were on their way, then they had been there before everyone but just playing in the puddles and not standing in line; also, at first they were leaving at two (then her daughter said, "Mom, you said we were leaving at 6!") and then at noon and would miss their ride--one of my moms called her on her lies.  The head wrangler basically promised all a spot--and the leader still had her girls physically cut mine off (they were bigger.) It really was quite appalling.  She knew she was wrong, but people who know they are in the wrong often dig in much harder than anyone else.  And they don't give in to reason or sympathy.  One of the moms was surprised that, being an out lesbian, I wasn't better at conflict.  I told her that perhaps that was why--I have never seen a person's mind change via a quick conversation in a heated moment, especially not with yelling or any risk of embarrassment on the line.  It takes time and willingness and courage to change your mind.  And it is relatively rare.  Thankfully, all's well that ended well.  And it was a good teachable moment for Sis.)
• Western theme:  I should have guessed that a so-called "ranch" would be western-themed, but I was a little taken aback by all the wagon wheels and horse shoes, faux Indian items (tipis, really?), and cowboy stuff.  Sure, in Texas, we go overboard sometimes with the cowboy-and-Indian stuff, but this was amazing.  It was like the Buc-ee's rest stops, but more so!  There was country music piped in 24/7, even custom pool dividers made to look like TNT barrels, a singing cowboy in spurs, and a caricatured cowboy/miner at a theme lunch.  And, perhaps as a Texan, I was a little bothered by how it was all just window dressing.  I wouldn't quite call it cultural appropriation, but there was something slightly problematic about it all for me, just a vague sense that it was all overdone.  But then, in Texas, I think it's often overdone as well--I know we romanticize the Old West--and that's historically dishonest.  
• Besides horses, the girls swam, went mountain tubing (down a giant slide), bungee jumping on a trampoline, shot rifles and bows, played on a merry-go-round in a playground, went on paddle boats, participated in pie eating contests and trivia contests, sang karaoke, saw a magic show, went to a dance party.  It really was a wonderful array of activities.  And if it hadn't been raining, there would have been more time on the lake; as it was, our campfire was canceled.
• And then there were SWAPS!  I love swaps, which I believe I've said in the past.  And I had happily organized our crafts for RHR--we had a lasso, a bandana, a campfire, and I even made clothespin horses for the girls in our troop.  Most of them had never been to a swap meet before and so I helped get them started with the only phrase you need, "Do you want to swap?"  Of course, Girl Scouts can't say no--"be a sister to every Girl Scout"--and so you trade.  But I do advise taking a lanyard or zipper bag for the trades and a separate baggie to keep the ones you don't want to trade away.  Otherwise, you can trade swaps you don't want to keep or have duplicates of back and forth.  There were so many great ones--sleeping bags, owls, bows and arrows, archery targets, beaches-in-a-bag, pet rocks, pet clouds, tic-tac-toe games in a bag, pies on bottle caps, s'mores, etc etc etc.  I will admit to becoming overzealous; I probably should have left it to the girls, but I had fun swapping, too.  Sis didn't tell me to move along, she said, because she could see how much fun I was having.  And I really was.
• Food.  Yep, lots of food.  Think Cracker Barrel or Golden Corral.  Standard Americana fare.  Better than average.  Copious amounts.  Lots of choice.  But, the moms in my group just couldn't stop talking about food and eating.  It was tiresome--"Oh, this is good.  Isn't this good?  Aren't you surprised at how good this is?  I love salad, I could eat just salad.  I would be full for a whole day on this salad. I could be full for a whole day on this meal. I only need one meal a day.  I never eat this much.  I'm only eating because it's here. We'll have to exercise all of this off.  It's a good thing we don't always eat like this.  I'm giving myself an eating vacation. Look, unlimited soda.  I never drink soda. This is good soda.  I'll just drink this soda now.  I usually only drink water.  I don't drink anything with sugar.  I don't usually eat beef.  I only eat beef occasionally.  This is good beef and I just thought I'd treat myself.  I can't eat any more.  I'm still full from yesterday.  I'll just have one more ice cream.  I won't need to eat again."  STOP.  Mercy, American women often have such complicated and unhealthy relationships with food.  We barely spoke of anything else while we ate.  It was unpleasant.  But the girls loved it.  Sis had french fries, fried chicken, hamburgers, and lots of hot chocolate.  I doubt she had a vegetable all weekend!  And that's fine.  It was a vacation.  
• In the end, it was just a marvelous weekend.  The girls and moms had a delightful time.  And even though I'm not much into games or sports and I do tend to worry and be a stickler for rules, I had a great time, too.

I can't seem to embed the photos in the text.

Weekend Sports Warriors

It was a weekend of activity for us.  Sis had her first horse show of the season on Saturday, a home show which was kind of a dress rehearsal for the rest of competition.  She rode Steeler, which made her happy; through, really, riding any of them--Tucker, Pooh, Murphy, Brooke, Levi--would make her happy.  In fact, I'm convinced that she'd be just as glad to be around them as ride them.  Horse love is strong with that one.  She earned third and fourth places in equitation (don't ask, I don't know) and then first and second places in pole jumping.  She was very pleased, even commenting that she had one of each color now (which is what I said about swim meet ribbons decades ago!)   She stayed afterwards to help with clean up and to hang out with the other riders.  She loves it all.

On Sunday, Bud had a kung fu performance at a local college's dragon festival.  It was outside, which was a bit of a surprise, but it was at least a beautiful day (it had rained Saturday, so Sis's horse thing was inside.)  Bud performed his fist, broad sword, nine chain, and straight sword forms.  There was some trouble with the mats on the concrete--they kept slipping, making the kids recalibrate their forms to adapt.  We were afraid someone was going to be injured during a jump.  Bud landed funny on a cartwheel and hurt his ankle some, but he is better this morning.  He loves kung fu.  And we love watching him.  Any performance is a great learning experience, even one that is less than ideal.  He isn't competing this May, because of the school play, so now he can enjoy the sport instead of stressing over form for a few weeks.  He'll like that.

Birthday Weekend in Vermont

Having enjoyed Vermont so much this fall, we decided to visit again, this time in winter and, after the events of the last few weeks--deaths and politics--it was good for us to get away for a holiday weekend (I'm sorry we missed you this time, Sew and Sow.)  And it was marvelous!  Here are a few snapshots outlining the fun.




Our first stop in Vermont was the Vermont Country Store.  It's a rest stop, snack place, and souvenir shop.  We started our holiday shopping, picking up things for each other and friends and family.  We did not buy the hat that Bud models here!

A lovely tree with cookie ornaments

Next up:  King Arthur Flour.  Last time, we arrived very late in the day, when the bakery was almost completely empty of its goodies.  So we made an effort to arrive midday.  Oh, so good.  We had lunch--tasty grilled cheese, delicious homemade kaiser rolls, chocolate croissants, cardamom roll, and my favorite almond cloud cookies.  I liked the quote on the wall near the cafe, "All sorrows are less with bread" (Cervantes.)  And of course we did some shopping.  Sis was so excited to pick up boxes of cinnamon puff muffin mix, her new favorite.  And I got some unique mixes--Portuguese sweet rolls, Scottish oat bread, orange cranberry brioche. It was a tasty way to begin the weekend.

Another stop we made on the way was the Vermont Toy and Train Museum in Quechee.  There we wandered amid the displays of toys from our childhoods--Cher doll, Luke and Leia dolls, Donnie and Marie dolls, Holly Hobby dolls, various lunchboxes including Holly Hobby, Happy Meal toys, bubble bath dispenses, boxed Halloween costumes with plastic masks, Fisher Price Little People.  And there was a great model train through the Vermont countryside in summer, fall, and winter.


In the same complex, there were various shops, including an antiques store, with old photos ("instant ancestors"), tools, tea sets, food tins.  Fun to wander with the kids.

And then we arrived in Woodstock, considered one of the most picturesque towns in the country.  With holiday decorations, snow, early American houses, a preserved downtown including old dry goods store and pharmacy and unique shops, covered bridge, nearby river, and the surrounding mountains, it really is a great little place.  And we were staying at the Woodstock Inn, a venerable hotel sitting back from the town green.  (Lambeth, the kids said it was second only to the Lainston as their favorite place to stay!)

In our room were two treats--chocolate-covered strawberries and a notice that we would be riding in the town's Wassail parade, on the hotel's own wagon, both arranged by Mama and the concierge for my birthday!!!!  Wonderful, wonderful, wonderful.  It made for the perfect weekend.

But before the parade Saturday afternoon, we spent Saturday morning wandering the town, listening to the high school band play carols, and visiting the Dana House and the historical society with its displays on Christmas past.  (This was after breakfast, when we discovered our waitress grew up in the town we live in and her cousin owns the deli near our pediatrician's office.  Small world.)  Sis and Bud even ran down to the river behind the house, enjoying the snow (which we haven't really had in Connecticut.)

The parade!!  Mama had given me a heads-up about it, actually, first to see if I were interested and second so that I could pick a festive outfit.  As the theme was Victorian, I wore one of my long historic house skirts and my lovely blue wool cloak from Gommie, under which were layers of sweaters, leggings, extra skirts, and warm socks--because the morning temperature had been 3F!!  We all got a ride to the staging area where Sis was in her element around all of the horses.  Across from us was the donkey brigade which we just read about in the morning's paper (the group helps youth and adults with developmental disabilities who take care of the miniature donkeys.)  The little donkeys wear stuffed animals on their backs and pull small carts, led by their handlers.

And then we got on our wagon, wearing matching plaid fleece scarves supplied by the hotel.  The festooned wagon was led by two humongous Belgian draft horses.  We rode along with another family and an older couple, singing "Rudolph," "Jingle Bells," and "We Wish You a Merry Christmas!" and waving to the crowds (over 2,000 cheering people!)  It really was wonderful to see all the holiday cheer.  And I liked seeing the old town from the wagon, which put me back in the 19th century.  Though, it was pretty cold.

After the parade, we warmed up by the fire at the hotel with hot chocolate (and Bailey's!)  At 4pm, we went to look at the town tree, Yule bonfire, and luminaries as the sun set.  Dinner was the Wassail Feast at the hotel, with a variety of dishes such as prime rib, sliced salmon, Yorkshire Pudding, pumpkin bread pudding, buche de noel, and trifle.  Mama and I made Yard of Flannel--hot apple cider and rum-whipped cream--and sat by the fire.

That evening we sat in the room, warming up from the day.  I worked on my crocheted birthday blanket, in Lion Brand Thick and Quick Celestial Stripes.  The kids made Rainbow Loom bands and played with their light-up wheelie bopper toys from the Vermont Country Store.  (It was a no-screen weekend.)

Sunday, though it was cold again, we went to Billings Farm--with its draft horses, decorated farmhouse, and craft activities.  The kids dipped their own candles and then Bud made a pomander with cloves and a clementine.  Sis was enamored with the white Percheron draft horses and some more Belgians.  And I liked the snow, the barns, and the warm kitchen with apple pie and roasted pumpkins.

  

On our way home, we ate at delicious Worthy Kitchen (poutine!  fried chicken!  pickled pineapple!)  and then moseyed our way home.  We did stop at the lake we'd visited with my folks in October--it was completely frozen and snow-covered.  I did a 20-yard hike into the woods and watched Sis poked the ice with her toes.   

We got home after dark, with snow falling gently on our town, the last little treat of the weekend.

My favorite photo, from town (actually taken from the car as we drove by.)

-=-=-=-=-=-=-

There was one uncomfortable thing that happened repeatedly in Vermont:  there were a lot of questions about our family, race- and/or gender-based.  From the woman at King Arthur Flour who thanked me for having a big heart and adopting Sis, to a white woman who said hi to Mama in Mandarin and was surprised she didn't speak Chinese, to the six or seven people (and I'm not exaggerating here) who mistook Mama for a boy/my son, Sis for a boy, and Bud for a girl.  Never have so many assumptions been spoken to us aloud by so many in such a short time.  It was rather disconcerting.  We've had less trouble in rural Texas, for goodness sake.  Come on, Vermont, what's with that?  (And no, it wasn't just the tourists from elsewhere.)
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