Unpredictable. Variable. Impermanent.
And tonight, I'm having a thunderstorm.
My pain has increased since seeing the PT, who did more harm than good, despite being a great listener with an appealing theory; I regret going and am paying for it daily. Hindsight. And church just isn't the same--I stood by myself eating at our Thanksgiving supper, not wanting to hover over the adults sitting at other tables, but also not wanting to be all alone. I felt so awkward, though everyone is always nice and asks how I am. I'm tired and lonely and frustrated and angry! And now there is a big brouhaha with a playgroup moms holiday party we've been planning since September--delays, misunderstandings, hurt feelings, general confusion, disappointment. I've been so looking forward to it (even though we canceled my favorite part, the cookie swap, to please some people). And now who knows what will happen.
I know, with weather practice, that I'm supposed to acknowledge the "weather" and move on, without getting caught up in the vagaries of it.
Tonight, at least, I'm stuck in the rain without an umbrella.
I feel your pain. Well, not physically, but the annoying realization that while you had the date and the event written in stone, others might not be as committed. It is very upsetting and I would imagine especially so when one is dealing with constant, unrelenting pain. I know you probably will have pulled out your umbrella by now, so I'm hoping that it's helping to keep you dry.
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