Home Alone, 2

"B-U-U-U-R-R-R-R-P-P-P-P-P!" Bud let loose a burp.

"Remember that's a 'home alone' rule, Bud," I remind him, invoking our rule that some behaviors are only for at home when no one but the family is here. Otherwise, I'm fine with burping and other body humor (like our almost constant discussion of "toots," at which both children excel. Consider my way of injecting a little male locker room behavior into the household! Or what I imagine it to be, at any rate.)

He starts to wonder who "family" might be. And we laugh as we wonder who would mind him joyfully burping at the table and who would burp along with him. We decide, really, only Goo would be added to our list for burping, that anyone else might not appreciate it.

But then Sis gets jealous because she can't burp on command like Bud and I can. "Bud, how do you do that."

And so he actually walks her through the steps of gulping water, taking a deep breath, and letting it roar. But she still can't manage, mainly we think because she sips and gets no air when she drinks. Can't seem to break her of the dainty habit. Which is fine, actually good, in general, but not conducive to burping.

She'll keep practicing. Home alone, of course.

-=-=-=-=-

"Mooooooooooommmmmmmmmmmmmmmm, don't leave me here!"

For the record, I have not once left the children behind. Nor am I even one of those parents who threatens to leave the children behind. So I don't know why there is this constant refrain of not being left behind (but I blame Bush), usually as we are transitioning from house to porch but trying to keep the door closed so the cats don't get out.

But this time we were still smack dab in the middle of the living room, trying to get ready to go to the library and I'd set a timer by which time they needed to be ready to go. They hate that and think it's a race, with losers, and that the loser will be left behind. Which is theoretically tempting. But ridiculous.

So, this time when the refrain started, I stopped in my tracks and explained, "Bud, I'm not going to leave you here. In fact, I can't. It's against the law in Connecticut to leave children home alone."

His face lit up at this bit of news.

I continued, "I could try to leave you here but the police would find out and put me in jail. So, I'm not going to leave you."

Sis, our lawyer -in-training because of her quick, precise, and inquisitive mind (not to mention argumentative, rule-bound, and loophole-seeking), said, "So, there has to be an adult here all the time? Who is an adult? Is our babysitter an adult?"

"Yes, the babysitter counts as an adult. So do Mama and I and your grandparents and the parents of your friends."

"So one of you has to be here? Or, I can go with Mama and you can stay with Bud?"

"Right. Okay, are we ready to go?"

And they were, with no more choruses about being home alone.