New Inspirations

I'm concurrently reading two books, Jim Trelease's Read-Aloud Handbook and Laurie David's The Family Dinner, both persuasive nontraditional parenting manuals with clear and specific objectives--read more, eat together more--that are preaching to my proverbial choir.

Trelease's book, around for 20 years or more, has amazing statistics and anecdotes about the power and influence of reading to kids early and often, and not just when they can't read on their own. Best of all, there is a long "treasury" of books listed at the end with plot summaries and age recommendations. One thing he asserts is that children's listening skills are way beyond their reading skills, so that you don't really necessarily only want to read a simpler Dr. Seuss to a beginning reader; you want them to read it on their own. Instead, you also want to read more sophisticated picture books (usually written at a 4th grade level, I believe) and short novels to beginning readers to continue to engage their interest and love of reading. And so, already fans of Jack and Annie of The Magic Tree House series, we've begun reading a much older version of the genre, The Boxcar Children. The first dozen or so books were written in the 1920s, with the rest of the 100+ book series penned more recently. So far, the kiddos are intrigued by Henry, Jessie, Violet, and Benny as they begin to convert an abandoned boxcar into a home following the death of their parents. After that (that being the first in the series not the whole series), we're considering Stuart Little and Charlotte's Web, both by E.B. White and both highly recommended by Mama Teacher. Then perhaps Beverly Cleary's Two Times the Fun (about twins!) and maybe My Father's Dragon or Chocolate Fever. And of course, there's always the Little House books, which we've already started. Trelease does note that kids will gravitate to the familiar, which explains their obsession with Bearnstain Bears and Star Wars and a new interest in Amelia Bedelia and Nate the Great, and we're still doing those too.

It is, as I noted in a previous post, also because of Trelease that we bought nighttime reading lamps which will allow the kids some special alone reading time at night after tuck-in. They beamed from ear to ear tonight as they switched on their little cloud lamps and settled into reading some Star Wars and Chinese New Year books. One of these, a Star Wars pre-reader they actually read all the way through to me the other day, missing only "powerful" and "pilot" because they could guess at the familiar characters and read many of the sight words. But like Trelease advocates, we're still going to read outloud . . . and I can't wait to get to Redwall, Judy Blume, and, of course, Harry Potter!

On another parenting note, I've been skimming Laurie David's The Family Dinner, a new and much-hyped release about getting families not only to eat dinner together but to cherish that time as special. As with Trelease, the reasoning is powerful and the book just as much fun, with recipes, conversation starters, even food-related poetry. We already had a dinner conversation game but used several of the questions from her list tonight. And they liked playing "Mommy Doesn't Like Peas" (or p's, as you try to name what else to serve without knowing, until you figure it out, not to guess words with a "p" in it). Sis got it right away. And though I haven't yet come across a section on "theme dinners," I'm sure there is one, or should be, which is why we had Swedish night tonight (and have had "backwards night" or "breakfast night" in the past--we love theme dinners). I did appreciate the section that talked about do's and don'ts at dinner, my favorite being that everyone is there the whole time, from set-up to clean-up, something we don't usually do but tried tonight to great success. Of course, harder for me is no distractions--because when I often get up to walk off sitting, I usually pass and then, gasp, check the computer. Shame. And, though I'm not sure it is specifically related to anything in the book, I did buy a water pitcher to facilitate drinks (I'm always hopping up to get someone a second or third glass of water--they can't easily reach the filtered water faucet) and real glass glasses so that the kids can feel more responsible and grown up. Both add to the specialness of the table.

Lastly, recipes. I love reading recipes. I don't yet know if any of these are bound for our table soon, even the section on our new "Meatless Monday" event, but I did make a list of what the kids will usually eat without grumbling and came up with more than 18 entrees and 11 sides, much more than I expected it to be. That gave me real hope, especially with the no-sauce, no-casseroles, no-beans, and other restraint, as I try to embrace her suggestion to only make one real meal (and I've found it is much better received if I don't ask for their votes each night or even tell them in advance what I'm making!!) And so, with all of that swirling in my head, I had lots of fun shopping this morning for a week's worth of meals and then putting Swedish night on the table.

That's what's great about reading books like these: your good intentions are confirmed and given new life. And everyone has a good time together in the bargain.

Read All About It

At first focusing solely on their own names, Sis and Bud are currently obsessed with spelling, making up combos of letters to see if I know the "word" (i.e. "what does E-O-R-R-T spell?") and asking how to spell words they already know, like "drum," "pancake," and "Shirt." I guess we're officially pre-readers now.

Which is a subject under discussion in my playgroup now. One mom sent a link about reading chapter books to pre-readers, which argues "The traditional time kids start chapter books is when they learn how to read them by themselves. The trouble with this is that it goes against that fact that a child's listening level is higher than the reading level until the teenage years." The website's author, DaddyRead advocates to begin reading chapter books, at least 50% of the time, with children as young as 3, who will gain from the use of their imaginations (vs. relying on pictures), the real-life stories, and the continuous chapter structure (to loosely paraphrase). Of course, as an art historian, it's important to me that there are still picture books especially after children have learned to read chapter books in order to foster visual thinking skills. But we're gonig to try the chapter books, just for fun, after several moms reported positive responses. Today at the bookstore, we purchased two books in the recommended Mary Pope Osborne series, The Magic Tree House about siblings who travel through time, in our two books, to meet a saber-tooth tiger and also the dinosaurs. There are other books on China, the Revolutionary War, knights, mummies, and pirates. Truly, Mama and I were excited to choose several titles and had to restrict ourselves to one for each kid (well, and the historical study guides with the facts behind the novels.) We'll see how it goes.

But I'm not trying to push the reading thing, even if people at the table next to us this morning must have thought I was an overly ambitious mother as I stressed the sounds in "drum" and tried to get them to guess the letters, which they did (though that "u" is tricky). It's not scientific. I'm not even sure I'm "supposed" to be doing this. I'm just trying to respond to their questions. Which are constant, including Sis's extraordinary, "Mommy, does that say 'zoo'" when spotting the word on the restaurant placemat on Saturday. I think she read that. They're also both memorizing more books and songs right now, even the notecard I put in Sis's lunch which she had me read at breakfast and then repeated over and over again.

I'm all for keeping summer "academic-free" in the homework sense of the word and found myself overreacting at the library earlier this summer when I came across the school district's required summer reading program, complete with specified time amounts and book reports. Required, my butt. Try and make me. The whole tone of the letter, trumpeting the "joy of reading," belied what the program will really do: fail. Kids who would read for fun will be turned off by all the work; kids who wouldn't have read for fun won't and then be penalized at school, just what you want for at-risk students. I suddenly had visions of homeschooling just to avoid such misguided programs! Or visions of mom-against-the-school when I adamantly refused to have them participate. Or finally, visions of compromise as I realized that school is often (in good training for life) about learning how to jump through silly hoops successfully so you can move along to what you like better (i.e. how I define doing math homework and science fair).

But I did like reading about programs that now let children choose their reading material. My favorite English class in high school was a yearlong self-directed study: we designed a theme for each grading period and reported on our books creatively at the end. I can't remember most of what I read, specifically, if you were to ask for titles, though I did a section on American classics (Faulkner, Steinbeck, Hemingway--stuff I wasn't getting in my American lit class), mythology, Phantom of the Opera. One student did all year on Edith Wharton. Looking back, I'd love to have done a year on women writers like Austen or Eliot. And Wharton. But it was having the power to decide for myself and following through with my choices that I most valued.

Which is why, just like my mom, I have trouble saying "no" when my kids express an interest in a book, at the bookstore, yard sales, even the library. I don't (really) care if they want Dora or the Bearnstain Bears or yet another book on dinos, even if those wouldn't be my choices for them, as long as they want to read. And so, on the ride to and from the restaurant, and even while we were there, we all poured over the book orders they got today, very excited about the chance to choose our next books, discussing and debating and changing choices several times (I think Sis is going with Clifford, Bud with Skippyjon Jones finds Bones, and I'm thinking about The House in the Night, the 2009 Caldecott). Reading them will come soon enough.

My Mom is Here

And you know what that means: fewer blog postings. I think this happens for two reasons. She's here and so we're out doing things. And she's here so I don't need to blog so she can know what we're doing. My mom is one of my main readers. I know there are a few other regular readers--my sister, my dad (when Mom prints the posts out for him) Lambeth, my cousin S in Texas, and a few women in my playgroup (mainly JG, T, and TE, but not JL!). But other than that, I don't realize who reads this blog; I don't even know how many people read it.. In fact, sometimes it's quite surprising because I don't remember that others know these stories in my posts. A woman at church apparently reads--hi grandma of 6 month old twins!--and mentioned it recently and for a second I forgot that other people can read this. So, if you know me, and you read this, let me know. I'm just curious. And kinda flattered. So, thank you!