Thursday, January 19, 2017

Anger and Depression

I'm still mourning the presidential election.

I've definitely worked through some of the so-called (and debated) stages--denial, anger, depression.  I'm stuck there; I doubt I'll ever get to acceptance.  At least not acceptance in a positive way.  I accept that he has been elected president and that no electoral college or even impeachment will change that.  

In fact, I am extremely cynical.  I see all these calls for petition signatures and phone calls to elected officials to object to his cabinet nominees, his lack of divestiture of his holdings, his probable treason in cooperating with Russia, and I admit to laughing at the naiveté.  Seriously, if the liberal, democratic population mobilized for months to elect Clinton--and managed to win the popular vote by 3 million--and yet he is still being sworn in even while admittedly breaking ethics laws, supported by a spineless GOP who didn't like him during the election but is doing nothing to oppose him now (because winning trumps everything, right?), and appointing people with little experience or even understanding of their positions who also already break ethics laws and seem on their way to confirmation,  while firing immediately many of the people who have kept the government moving (embassies, etc.), what do we really think a few petitions--even a giant march on Saturday--will do??

And yet.

And yet, I acknowledge that silence isn't the answer--I've read about the "good" Germans who didn't object to Hitler.  So I know my cynicism cannot be a long-term plan.    I just haven't found what I think will work.  But I do know that I am against racism, sexism, homophobia, anti-Semitism, ableism, and discrimination based on sex, gender, religion, race, creed, ability.  All those phrases floating around now--Black lives matter.  Water is life.  Women's rights are human rights.  Love is love.  Science is real.  No human is illegal.  Kindness is my religion.--I believe those.  Even if the new president and his incoming officials don't.

Oh, I'm going to miss Obama and his family and the society he and his officials tried to create.  The change he brought.  The hope he stood for.  I remember watching his first election night speech and his first and second inauguration with the kiddos. Seriously, how do you explain to kids that the class bully is now in charge?  That they have to follow rules and be kind but the president won't?

Tomorrow, I'll be in mourning.  I won't watch the inauguration.  Perhaps I'll even wear black.

Actually, I'll be on retreat all weekend, away from the news, resting and rejuvenating.

Peace.  Hope.  And then change.

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